Chris Serico

Huge fan of your work.

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

To: Everybody
Subject: Dance Now
Cc: Music Factory

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

Food is for eating, and the great @Eden_Eats (happy birthday!) is for following/retweeting. https://t.co/wxpdK7ENs0

[Eden Dranger @Eden_Eats]

"Excuse me, waiter. Is my order almost ready to Instagram?"

-people

[Eden Dranger @Eden_Eats]

Fahrenheit is the Hotmail of temperature scales. A lot of people still use it, but most of us don't know why.

[erin mallory long @erinmallorylong]

IG stories I will watch look like this: — — — — — — — —
IG stories I won't watch look like this: ...........................................

[Abbi Crutchfield @curlycomedy]

What idiot called it Beauty and the Beast and not Saved by the Belle?

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@Eden_Eats Thanks, Eden! Your scripts are awesome, and studios should pay you unreasonable sums accordingly.

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

Mute All Bad Tweets

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@30for30 When is this re-airing or appearing on the app? My DVR only recorded the first 5 minutes and the rest of #StrikeTeam is nowhere to be found.

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

Going grocery shopping. Anyone want anything?

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@CarvelIceCream Upside: With this math, I may still be in my 20s!

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@LizzSum Please launch a Twitter account called @.RumoredBCPressBoxMeals.

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@DanHoppSports ok cool can the rangers have the pens' bs stanley cups then cool yeah thanks

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@LizzSum What is it these days? It's been a solid 18 years since I've sampled it.

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@GregPoehler Let me know if you want to borrow this. (Yes, it's authentic. No, it wasn't originally mine.)

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

I don't care what anyone says: This was, by far, your best album. https://t.co/RaV8wGDdbC

[Pat Kiernan @patkiernan]

Main attraction in #Williamsburg tonight is the @Refinery29 #29Rooms exhibit. Endless photo opportunities.

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

Theory: This jackhammer operator finished work four hours ago and just wants attention.

[jonny sun @jonnysun]

wow its so amazing that i can use latin, greek, AND cyrillic to say:

T…A…K…E…
M…Y…
H…A…M…
B…O…Y https://t.co/y7faMhKQqr

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@jonnysun Dammit, Jonny, why is this tweet so perfect?

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@Ibleed_sarcasm In 2017, there are things called jokes.

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

@Shahrcasm k thanks also good luck with your 140,000 retweets

[Chris Serico @ChrisSerico]

Twitter (2014): Your funny tweet might get 100 likes!

Twitter (2017): Here's a depressing tweet with 140,000 retweets, and it's not yours.