Christian Royce - Not The Rapper

I'm a comedian. He/Him/Sir/Daddy/King/Lord Raikage.

I'm riled up easily and get into pickles.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

"What drug made you do this?"
"The Clout" - @Alexajaggs

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

@_kingjonah And he Lowkey dropped a new meme with this pic 🤣🤣🤣

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

.@GovParsonMO, please do not let Missouri execute
@innocence @the_MIP client #MarcellusWilliams, an innocent person — where there is overwhelming evidence that his trial was constitutionally unfair — on 9/24. https://t.co/9VpnmMBEqt

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

@KwaminM Let the church say amen.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

@IAmCreeSummer I just wanna give your flowers. You the shit.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Whether they're prepping a green outfit or HR Paperwork I wanna wish all the ladies a
Happy St. Patty's Day.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Drake is the Derrick Jaxn of rap.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Dear White People,
No one wants an acoustic cover of ANYTHING you'd hear at a black Cookout.
- Management
@Logic301 & @taylorswift13 we're looking at you.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Keyshia Cole wasn't even singing. She was just reciting City Girl Hymns.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

TFW you realize you're a self-destructive ass clown that has a thing for hot, opinionated intellectuals with a master's degree in sarcasm. #HarleyQuinn

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

I'm making a new holiday called Cornballs Day where we wear our best Dockers to brunch and smoke dispo weed at a Childish Gambino concert.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Ya know what Hayleigh you really CAN just wear a swirly dress and drink a float.
You don't HAVE to get all our black/brown/gay asses beat by wishing it was the 50's again.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Aight forreal who wanna get this relationship going so we can pretend to break each other's prized possessions for TikTok?

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Black Folks in 2018: IS THIS YOUR KING?!?!

Black Folks in 2023: YOU COULD'VE GONE HOME WITH YOUR DAUGHTER, NIGGA!!!

#Quantumania

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

All the straight niggas got curved by the same 13 mixed girls in 2009 and that's the reason why Drake has a career.

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

They put hot, white psychopath in a murder-mystery set in modern day Bridgerton and I've never seen a better example of a writing team knowing their audience. #YouSeason4

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

HuffPo Headlines From The Future.

"Top 10 Side Effects of Sythetic Water Big Pharma's Keeping From You."

"Here are 3 Websites Where Can Secure Affordable Sunscreen For Your Children."

"Dear All Men, Impending Doom Does Not Imply Consent."

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

Chris Paul after KD got sent to #Phoenix

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

@Kwaselow LMFAO

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

I asked my girl if she wanted Beyonce tickets she said, "That's OK, my Spotify work just fine. Take that money and buy stock in Ticketmaster."

I guess we just think differently in this house. 🤷🏿‍♂️

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

@geewayluver 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[Christian Royce - Not The Rapper @ChristianRoyce]

@tarantinohotgrl There's somethin wrong with y'all lmao