I’m Matt Tuttle, a divorce coach.
Divorce can make every problem feel urgent and every decision feel permanent. I help people separate the noise from what matters and choose their next step deliberately.
I’m also building an app to make that kind of support more accessible.
After a divorce, “I want to feel like myself again” can mean a lot of things.
What’s one small sign, in an ordinary day, that would tell you you’re starting to feel more like you?
Maybe it’s making a decision without second-guessing it. Maybe it’s enjoying something without guilt. Maybe it’s something else entirely.
As a divorce coach, I don’t need you to convince me that staying or leaving is the right answer.
I want to understand what makes the choice hard for you.
You deserve room to think without having to defend a conclusion first.
Karen, that's a question a lot of people notice and then push away. Sometimes the relief is about the marriage, and sometimes it's about everything else that's been piling up. Getting curious about what exactly feels lighter may help someone see it more clearly before deciding what it means.
You’ve rewritten the same text to your ex six times.
What are you hoping the next version will do?
Explain the logistics? Get an apology? Finally make them understand?
Those are different hopes. Knowing which one you’re carrying may change what you send.
@KarenCovy That exhaustion piece matters, Karen. It can be hard to think beyond getting through the next conversation. Your point about understanding what “temporary” could mean is worth slowing down for, especially when saying yes feels like the quickest way to get some relief.
The attorney needs an answer. Your child needs a ride. Work needs you to function.
Meanwhile, you’re trying to understand what happened to your marriage.
Before asking “Why can’t I handle this?” try naming the separate things you’re being asked to handle.
I’m building a guided app for people who feel overwhelmed by divorce.
I want to understand the moments when support is hardest to find.
If you’re facing divorce now—or have been through it—when did you most wish you had help thinking clearly?
Replies or DMs are welcome. No private details needed.
Progress during divorce doesn’t always mean taking action.
Sometimes progress is deciding to wait, gathering better information, accepting uncertainty, or recognizing that a problem belongs with a lawyer, therapist, or financial professional.
A deliberate pause is still a decision.
@KarenCovy The “right time” may not arrive as certainty. Maybe the first step is getting clear on what isn’t working, what support you need, and what decision you could own—whether you stay, leave, or aren’t ready to decide.
@KarenCovy The deeper piece can be hard to name. Sometimes it’s not only missing the person; it’s losing the version of yourself that formed inside the marriage. “Moving on” may start with understanding what you want to carry forward.
Your feelings may be completely real while your first explanation of what they mean may still be incomplete.
You can honor the feeling and remain curious about the story attached to it.
That small separation can create room for a wiser response.
A useful distinction during divorce:
What do I control?
What might I influence?
What must I respond to, even though I cannot control it?
The third category still matters. Accepting that you cannot control something doesn’t mean pretending it doesn’t hurt.
When divorce makes everything feel urgent, ask:
What actually requires a decision today?
What needs attention but can wait?
What feels urgent because I’m afraid?
Clarity often begins by separating those three things.