CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025

blowing web3’s back out…from our mom’s basement - powered by @palantirtech

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

Hi I’m Johnny Cumville and you’re watching cumass.

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

FEET AND CUM

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

CUMBASE WILL FUCK ANYTHING

[Spooky JL @spooky_JL]

You can’t eat IRR but you can fuck it

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

MY CUM HAS HIGH BLOOD CONTENT

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

FEET

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

I’m touchin sellside pleb I am jacking off all over him and rubbing my cum into his skin #TouchSellSidePleb2026

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@alleiigh @rvc330 [email protected]

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

#TouchSellsidePleb2026 @PalantirTech

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

FEET

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

#TouchSellsidePleb2025 about to become #TouchSellsidePleb2026 @sellsidepleb @PalantirTech

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

Woke up and touched my meat mmm @sellsidepleb bussy probably so wet mmmm stroking my shit thinking about touching sell side pleb mmm put your fingers up my ass like you’re digging for blood diamonds mmmm oh my god oh oh oh fuck oh OH OHHHHH

#TouchSellSidePleb

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@ArbitrageAndy1 Retarded faggot

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@nerdcircus_ @chepchumba_val or CUMBASE

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

The CumBase holiday video is now LIVE (it’s all our 10,000 employees jacking off into an Olympic size swimming pool until it is full while wearing Christmas hats and singing carols)

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

Jacking off all over the turkey to brine it (my cum has the perfect ph for this)

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@APompliano You are a fucking retard

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@kevingatestan69 @lilydsmith CumBase is doing this as well but with gooning

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@nerdcircus_ @Restructuring__ FEEEEEEEEEET

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@kevingatestan69 @bryan_johnson @PalantirTech @Klarna FEET

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

Thank you @bryan_johnson for being a top 0.01% customer of CumBase. However we have used @PalantirTech to extract your FICO score and note it has fallen below 500 due to a $2.7B @Klarna balance from you purchasing millions of our feet pics. Sadly we must terminate your account

[Bryan Johnson @bryan_johnson]

We just raised $60 million for Blueprint.

To bring my longevity protocol to you.

Our society has made us unwell…metabolically, mentally, spiritually. We’re addicted. Social media, porn, nicotine, junk food, fast food, smartphones, streaming, energy drinks, and gambling. Each perfectly engineered to keep us in their grip.

Years ago, I was owned by these systems. They wrecked me, and my health. I wish there had been someone in my life helping me break free. Blueprint will be that system. Collectively, we will claw our power back. Blueprint will take better care of people than they can themselves. Better than the healthcare system does. Better than our societal norms allow.

We will be your home for health.

Blueprint will help you feel clear-headed and vibrant. You will become more jacked and beautiful with our presence in your life. There’s nothing better than feeling your best.

Some of the world’s most powerful people are backing Blueprint.

Talent are pivoting their careers to join our team. They rightly see that Blueprint is in the right place, at the right time, for the global emergence of the new macro trend of health, anti-aging and Don’t Die.

In this post I’ll cover:
+ Who’s investing
+ What Blueprint will be
+ Who’s joining
+ Open positions
+ How to get early access

The next era of human is here.

[WHO’S INVESTING]
This remarkable group of people are Blueprint investors. They are backing the next great frontier: human longevity.

+ Akshay Bd
+ Alex Hormozi
+ Amanda Cassatt
+ Andrej Karpathy
+ Ari Emanuel
+ Balaji Srinivasan
+ Bill Lee
+ Brad Keywell
+ Brian & Veronica Grazer
+ Bryan Meehan
+ Cameron Winklevoss
+ Carter Reum
+ Chris Hollod
+ Dan Manges
+ Dave Morin
+ Don Wilson
+ Drew Houston
+ Emmett Shear
+ Eric Demuth
+ Fareed Adib
+ Generational Family Office
+ Jason Fried
+ Jay Shetty
+ Joe Gebbia
+ Joe Lonsdale
+ John Carmack
+ Joshua Kushner
+ Kamal Ravikant
+ Karim Beguir
+ Kevin Hartz
+ Kim Kardashian
+ Kyle Widrick
+ Logan Paul
+ Michael Cao
+ Michael Kives
+ Naval Ravikant
+ NIV
+ Olaf Carlson-Wee
+ Paris Hilton
+ Pippa Lamb
+ Saquon Barkley
+ Ken Katz
+ Seth Bannon
+ Shayne Coplan
+ Steve Aoki
+ Steven Bartlett
+ Suna Said
+ Tyler Winklevoss
+ Winnie Liu
+ Wojciech Zaremba

[TEAM]
Defeating death would be humanity’s greatest accomplishment. Big things are happening right now in our small corner of the galaxy. We see the consequence of this moment and are working to positively influence the future of intelligent existence. We believe that product is philosophy and companies can influence the world.

Join if you love to work insanely hard and also get eight hours of sleep.

Joining our team as CEO is Gyre Renwick. He was previously President of Modern Health and before that an executive at Google Health and Lyft Healthcare. Gyre builds complex health systems into growth engines.

In this next chapter, I am doubling down on Blueprint and Don’t Die. I’m all in. Gyre will run the business and I will focus on vision, strategy, and birthing Don’t Die into the world.

Blueprint is the practical manifestation of Don’t Die. They are the same thing. I will continue to juggle many full-time jobs: rejuvenation athlete, Blueprint vision, leading the Don’t Die moral philosophy and ideology, building a global community, and content creation. Ultimately, both Blueprint & Don’t Die ladder up to the same thing, answering the question: ‘what does humanity do as we give birth to super intelligence?’.

Kate Tolo (co-founder), Gyre, and I will be in lockstep building this mission together.

Roles we are filling now:
+ Chief Technology Officer
+ Chief Product Officer
+ Chief Medical Officer
+ Chief Marketing Officer
+ Engineers of all types
+ See all open roles

Refer your most talented friends. If you don’t see a job fit, still email us.

[BLUEPRINT VISION]
We’re making my protocol accessible to everyone. To replicate everything including the measurements, protocols, therapies - and make it easy and accessible for others to do in a community. For your family and friends to do this too.

Many think that the world’s most powerful people have their health figured out. The truth is, most everyone is floundering. Luxury concierge services often do little for wealthy people as the biggest gains are not in expensive therapies but daily habits. We will help you build life foundations, starting with the basics and graduating to advanced therapies.

Our goal is to be more effective in helping you achieve your health goals than any health system or concierge in the world.

Blueprint will build around:
+ your preferences
+ your budget
+ your preexisting conditions
+ your prior results
+ your prescriptions
+ your level of effort

It’s health within context.

I built Blueprint to solve my own problem. My body and mind were broken, and I didn’t know who to trust to help me fix it. Everyone disagreed with everyone else. I found sanity in gathering a team of doctors and building a protocol based upon robust measurement and scientific evidence. It’s a methodical process that produces better outcomes and results in fewer mistakes and wasted time.

After my team and I built a protocol for me, my friends and family asked if they could get access too.  Then their friends and family asked and I said yes again. The circle kept on expanding until we stumbled into Blueprint becoming a company.

We will tell you to do less. Most good health can be achieved with very little effort. It’s the systems, infrastructure, knowledge, and piecing through the noise that is hard.

Blueprint is Bryan Johnson’s protocol, for everyone.

What this will practically mean:
+ Blood draws
+ Food delivery
+ GLP-1s
+ Rx prescriptions
+ Free protocols
+ Toxin testing
+ At-home tests
+ Skin care & hair care
+ Nutrition & supplementation
+ Advanced therapies

And your AI health companion will make it simple.

I like to call this my Autonomous Self. In the same way you put in an address and digital navigation tells you the best way to get there, Blueprint is navigation to vibrance. Our goal is to remove the thinking and hassle for you so that you can focus on building durable life habits and achieve the best health of your life.

I love thinking about what the future will say about us. When I think from the perspective of those who exist in the year 2500, I think they’ll observe that the 2020s and 2030s was the time when humans figured out that they were the first generation who wouldn’t die.

Early access below.

What an amazing opportunity. Let’s do this together.

Bryan

[CumBase #TouchSellSidePleb2025 @Cum_Base]

@snowmanllc Wrap your mind around THIS DICK