Dabere

✌

[That Fela Fella @CaponeDiAso]

This reminds me of that year Maersk got hacked, and the only reason they were able to recover quickly was because a power outage in their Lagos office took server offline, disconnecting it from the global network. 😂

[Danny Walter 🧸 @AjeboDanny]

1+1 = 3

“1,600 people die of Malaria everyday.”

You: But I had malaria last week and didn’t die.

[kamo👨🏾‍🍳 @kamsysrevenge]

🤣🤣🤣

[Old Man Rattle @oldrattle_]

instagram needs to understand that i’d rather jump off the chrysler building than download threads

[Sir Dickson @Wizarab10]

"I can never do this for a man/woman"

Run from them.

First principle of love is that it is KIND

[vavavoom @TheladyMarlene]

I’m of the opinion that if a man marries a woman who cannot be a “help meet” to him, he has to take responsibility for that choice.

If your wife is watching you struggle and has no interest in supporting you in whatever capacity she can, I’m not going to feel sorry for you.

[ִֶָ @Motee_1]

abeg abeg😭😭

[David Hundeyin @DavidHundeyin]

This is the kind of "opposition" Nigerians love. Sue the presidency in a court that is under the authority of the Chief Justice who is appointed by the presidency.

1,000 motion, 0 movement.

If you tell them that they'd get a much bigger result if they came out in numbers and blockaded the US embassy in Abuja like the Nigeriens did the French embassy in Niamey 3 years ago, they'll tell you "Why don't you come to Nigeria and do it yourself? CIA man!"

Make una continue to dey whine una selves. Continue to "hold your leaders accountable" by suing them in Kekere-Ekun's court, and "voting them out" with an INEC that receives funding from the US government under a commissioner that is an APC member.

And when it doesn't work, do it again. If it didn't work the first 569,000 times you already did it, try it another 697,000,000 times. When you're reaching the end of the 55 years you are statically likely to survive as a Nigerian and you're finally realising nothing has changed, instead of telling your kids to do the opposite of what you did, tell them "nIgEriA iS cUrSed, dO aNythInG yOu cAn tO mOvE tO cAnaDa".

Very wise people, Nigerians. 🥲

[Aleph @DEUSthaGOD]

No such thing, we stay battle-ready.
Onye gbọọ ọsọ mpa ya

[captain @kaptainswago]

i dey beg you 🙏🏾

[hotdogs water @pikwimin_]

"if 3% is a genocide then america has committed genocide several times in the last 100 years"

[Chetuya Chinagolum @Chetuyachinago]

This is like the perfect description of a CIA agent.

[SEUN Yk @YKoluwaseun9]

“My driver, my cook, yourself..”

Dangote sef dey cook🤣

[Dabere @D_Dabere_]

@tim_crest @NoFilterSkin Walahi

[Styled by Dave @Big__Dave_]

"Conspiracy theory"
All of una no go d!ė well

[Sir Chief Honorable Odionwere Lawrence @EkunweL]

They say it themselves 🤣🤣🤣 but if I say it, then I am a conspiracy theorist.

[Auggie The Serenading Psychic (🚰❤️‍🔥♣️) @CryptoMuse01]

Very quick recap for those who need the context:

America took about 200 soldiers and plenty helicopters and invaded Venezuela in the dead of the night.

Killed a bunch of people, ND kidnapped their president and his wife.

Now, they're in charge of another country's oil reserves and stuff (the biggest in the world, by the way).

And like the proper heist that it is, they're moving yet another (yes, you heard it right — dem don move some before) batch of Venezuela's gold reserves from the bank where the owners kept it to America!

That's how the good guys roll, shebi? After all, that's how it happens in movies na🤣

American elite soldiers jump down from helicopters and kidnap-rescue a sitting president and his wife and take him away in chains. No be so?

If you're waiting for the part where the people of Venezuela are saved from the fictitious Boogeyman by America — that part never happens.

Because this is not a Hollywood movie and the US is the Boogeyman.

[Abu The 𓃵 @Abu_The_Truth]

Imagine trying to explain how a the world's top-secret agent operates to someone who enjoys watching stuff like this and finds its funny.

[Biggest Mack @Big_Mck]

What is so special about your country that’s attracting the interest of the CIA or the U.S government, if you like?

Well, here’s your answer. This is perhaps the most simplified explanation. Even someone in kindergarten should understand it, after watching this video.

[Black_Melanin🥰 @itz_taser]

If I’m getting married to a man, and different women started posting different chats of him with them, with evidence that he slept with them, I am not leaving him. Except if I don’t love him.

I should leave him, so you can come and marry him? As long as he didn’t rape you or use force on you, nothing concern me.

I’m not the one that asked you to go and open your legs for my boyfriend.