ev

it’s a parable. humpty dumpy is the king.

[ev @EvaElena331]

@isaballs3 🥺❤️

[ev @EvaElena331]

i literally have nothing to say i just have bangs now and i think i’m cute

[ev @EvaElena331]

every day of my life it’s my fear of being pregnant vs my fear of being infertile

[ev @EvaElena331]

@benevamusic blocked.

[ev @EvaElena331]

@altj_u tiddie

[ev @EvaElena331]

me at 18: drunkenly falls down a flight of stairs at least once a week and is fine

me now, nearing the ripe age of 24: i literally just sat up in bed and cracked my back weird and now i can taste my spine. gonna go type that into webmd to find out what kinda cancer that is

[ev @EvaElena331]

almost peeing my pants while i’m on lunch so i can go to the bathroom on company time is modern day activism

[ev @EvaElena331]

@camillelablanc tell the truth are u talking about my mom

[ev @EvaElena331]

shia labeouf’s hot ones episode is my favorite tedtalk

[ev @EvaElena331]

“I think my grandma had her childhood hair on it” thanks so much i’ll never sleep again

[Alyse Messa @AlyseMessa]

Totally perfect.

[ev @EvaElena331]

queer eye for a spotless mind

[ev @EvaElena331]

no i actually don’t have a resting bitch face i just have a Bad Attitude™️

[ev @EvaElena331]

@howjudoin_ these subtweets....iconic

[ev @EvaElena331]

@taravkennedy i expect to hear about this first thing tomorrow morning.

[ev @EvaElena331]

@ali_booty yaaaa not what i meant by “special skills” 😅

[ev @EvaElena331]

the person i interviewed today started the interview by telling me about the time they hacked a bear to death with an ax and then cooked and ate it...

.....bold move but it’s gonna be a no from me thx for coming in???

[ev @EvaElena331]

@howjudoin_ awe thanx i’ll let lori know ☺️💕

[ev @EvaElena331]

update: she was Rainbow Fish this year 🐠🌈💙

[ev @EvaElena331]

#NewProfilePic

[ev @EvaElena331]

hey i miss my friends and family and sf so FUCKing much being away from this is so annoying!!!

[ev @EvaElena331]

@howjudoin_ that’s not funny.