FPL_DiCaprio 🕊️

Victoria Concordia Crescit

#FPL Maybe moneyball_Maybe maverick

Probably playing devils advocate

Opinions aren't accurate reflections of my opinions

[Dilan Esper @dilanesper]

One of my great crusades were I in Congress would be to clarify copyright law such that you can make an unauthorized music biopic and still use the artist's music.

Honestly I actually think it is a fair use under existing law, but IP owners hate litigating fair use.

[Magadh Updates @magadh_updates]

A girl posted a photo online and challenged people to find the location where it was taken.

What happened next is a reminder of how much information a single photo can reveal.

Using nothing more than a smartphone, internet access, and a keen eye for details, one person analyzed clues from the image and accurately identified the exact location.

Privacy on the internet is far more fragile than most people realize.

[Dead Pubs @dead_pubs]

Dead Pubs Presents… the Top Five World Cup Pubs (In London)

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

In America, a stranger will love you on sight, and you are simply expected to allow it.

I entered a coffee house. The young man behind the counter beheld me as though I were his brother home from war. "Hey man! How's it going! Love the whole look."

He loved my look. We had known each other four seconds. In my country such warmth is earned across years, or across a battlefield. This boy had granted it before I spoke a single word.

I resolved at once to be worthy of so sudden a friendship.

He asked my name, to write upon the cup. I understood the weight of this. He wished to record our meeting for all time. I drew myself up and gave it the breath it deserved.

"Nobunaga."

He paused. He nodded slowly, as a man does when he has heard greatness. Then he wrote, with great care, "NUGGET."

I looked at the cup. I looked at him. He was beaming, proud of the gift.

A samurai does not correct a gift. To refuse the name a friend bestows is to spit upon his kindness. He had heard my name, weighed it in his heart, and returned to me something he believed finer. Who was I to say he was wrong?

So I became Nugget.

When the drink was ready he called it out with feeling. "NUGGET!" I rose. I answered to it as a man answers to his own honor. I bowed to the room. Several people clapped. I did not know why, but I accepted their respect for the name I now carried.

I have returned every day for a week. I am Nugget at this establishment. The whole staff knows me as Nugget. They greet me warmly. "Nugget's back!"

I have built a life here, under a name I did not choose, given by a boy who could not hear me, and I find I do not wish to give it up.

So tell me honestly.

Eight hundred years my family carried one name. I lost it in four seconds at a coffee counter, and I have never felt more welcome.

Was it a fair trade?

Because Nugget, I think, is happy.

[FPL_DiCaprio 🕊️ @FPL_DiCaprio]

@FPLFella 🇿🇦

[FPL_DiCaprio 🕊️ @FPL_DiCaprio]

@FPLFella 🇺🇸

[B. @InvertTheWing]

Since Arsenal fans are quoting this, Congratulations for 30 year old Eze on winning a trophy before 23 year old Xavi Simons.

Let’s see at the end of the contracts.

[Thierry Ennui @TitiEnnui]

For Those Who Waited 22 Years.

[philip lewis @Phil_Lewis_]

Dozens of empty Waymos invaded an Atlanta neighborhood and circled a cul-de-sac for hours with no passengers

https://t.co/qvziT2fz2T

[👾vaa @reawiteva]

editing him like he’s a universal threat😂

[Bill Moore, Esq. @lawyer_memes]

The out-of-office autoreply is a clear symptom of moral decay.

I emailed a mid-level associate at 3 AM regarding a restructuring draft.

I instantly received a bounce-back stating he was hiking in Patagonia with limited Wi-Fi.

Limited Wi-Fi implies the existence of some Wi-Fi.

I sent him a calendar invite for a Zoom call at his local time.

I included a note saying that altitude sickness isn't a valid excuse for missing a redline.

He logged on twelve hours later from a satellite phone in a blizzard.

The wind was howling so loudly I couldn't hear his apologies.

I told him his formatting on page six was completely unacceptable.

He froze his fingers fixing it, but the document was pristine.

Nature is temporary.

Client retention is absolute.

[FPL_DiCaprio 🕊️ @FPL_DiCaprio]

@clivepafc Ive given up on martinelli

[Knowledge & History @xKnowledgeBANK]

These hand-painted special effects on British showgirl Suzanna Willis from the movie ‘The Monster Club’, 1981.

[Peter Anthony Cowan @living_energy]

Low-frequency electromagnetic fields can degrade collagen, weaken tendons, and cause soft-tissue damage at levels regulators call "safe."

We have a real world case study proving this:

An NFL team whose practice facility sits next to a massive electrical substation.

THREAD 🧵

https://t.co/4AFRlmqgZv

[Edward Elderman @edwereddie]

There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
W. Somerset Maugham

[Liam Nissan™ @theliamnissan]

😭

[truthache @truthache68]

Scientists found that fungi constantly send bioelectrical signals through their mycelium, like tiny messages moving through a living network.

By connecting those signals to a synthesizer, each pulse is turned into a musical note, letting the mushroom
"perform" in real time.

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[Planet Of Memes @PlanetOfMemes]

Elf on the shelf? What happened?