King Booty

cake fart enthusiast

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

It’s getting to be that time of year where everyone with a garden has way too many tomatoes, so here’s a great and easy recipe so none go to waste:
TOMATOES THROWN AT THE MAYOR

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@elsdawg @crankybabygorl I’ve eaten more than every man I’ve ever been with and I’m still thin, crazy how anecdotal proof of a thing is not actual proof and doesn’t matter anyways

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@jared_skers Only part time, they told me not to quit my day job

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

I work overnights at the Throw It Back Factory

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@parietines I intentionally ruined a date once by using my phone during the movie lol

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@MikeRay849009 @greywar777 @evmcglam @lydiakauppi That’s a funny one! Because of this, hospitals and clinics in rural communities are already closing their doors in my state. So if you live rurally it doesn’t even matter if you’re covered by Medicaid, Medicare, or an expensive private insurance. You literally can’t get care.

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

Was just transported to 2005 (TWENTY FUCKING YEARS AGO?!?) listening to the new @heyamine album, only reformed pop punk girlies will understand.

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@NebraskaMegan @willybamboo I’m screamingggg maybe Burlington coat factory

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@willybamboo @NebraskaMegan She used to own one of the best clothing shops in the Midwest (yes I’m including big cities), so yeah, kind of an authority on the matter lmao. Do you think elected officials hatch from an egg? 😂

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@doemisu That’s so funny, I call it shark eyes when my 1st grader gets overstimulated, but wtf is this therapist talking about? 😂

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@esjesjesj You have to turn off the setting to see anything past pg-13, it doesn’t even automatically show that stuff lmao

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@walter_dogg @stonedhusker @NebraskaMegan What do you mean name calling? That’s their name. It says it above their comment. Try reading.

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@NebraskaMegan It’s the way he’s obviously obsessing over you in the middle of the night that has my skin crawling a little bit lol

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@DonJBacon @NebraskaMegan Drunk tweeting popular women at midnight feels really on brand for a Nebraska Republican man lmao 🤡🤡🤡

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@dieworkwear Live forever sounds boring AF if you have to have a party at 6pm. And I’m an early to bed girl, but partying is partying, everyone has to get out in the night sometime.

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@offbeatorbit I got called old for using the phrase “Chick Lit,” he said I was showing my age (30), I thought it just meant that I was a weird library kid that befriended every librarian and not a single kid my age! Guess I’ll go hop in the damn grave!

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@LightsOutLam @BrightShirtOne @lilgrapefruits Anymore lmaooo you tried

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@ravenscimaven WE’RE UNWORTHY 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@GeonnCannon @IfyNwadiwe He came pretty close on that Fox News interview he just did 😂

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@BrightShirtOne @lilgrapefruits That’s so funny actually because men aren’t funny at all

[King Booty @Golden_Gawd]

@sarpyconserv @_ASAPBobby