whirlybird

what am I gonna do with a soul anyway Leviticus 20:18

[Khem Birch Society @NBABabySecret]

Hitting the last three words in the headline

[whirlybird @Jayhawk630]

@nocontextmemes Nitpick; office space was not stable they all were gonna fired by The Bobs

[whirlybird @Jayhawk630]

@jbear62 So good

[Tony Tost @tonytost]

This is so deeply accurate it hurts.

[Rob Fox III @RobFoxThree]

Mahomes and Kelce look like the dipshit henchmen in a Jason Statham movie.

[big pale tone 🤌 🍝 @BigPaleTone]

Can’t believe this is how he is selling people on the idea of a woman president. Smh.

[Kevin Finnerty @timeimmemorial_]

me when I hear fireworks going off at 10:01pm

[Work Retire Die @WorkRetireDie]

HR lady at the company retreat to talk about the new benefits package and why it’s actually good you have less coverage

[whirlybird @Jayhawk630]

@RussilloMemes @jake_koester54 catch up and you’ll understand

[Alanah Pearce @Charalanahzard]

There’s no way The Sopranos could get made in today’s society. They’d force a whole plot about a mob boss with ~anxiety~ going to therapy, both of his kids would be SJWs in interracial relationships, and there’d be a whole season about a gay mobster’s relationship struggles 🙄.

[John Foley @2008Philz]

HOLD ON HOLD ON HOLD ON...HER SISTER WAS A WITCH RIGHT? AND WHAT WAS HER SISTER? A PRINCESS, THE WICKED WITCH OF THE EAST BRO. YOU'RE GONNA LOOK AT ME AND YOU'RE GONNA TELL ME THAT I'M WRONG? AM I WRONG? SHE WORE A CROWN AND SHE CAME DOWN IN A BUBBLE

[whirlybird @Jayhawk630]

@JoyceKC @foodandwine @JMcLaughlin_23 just for the record I told you this weeks ago. I told Taylor she followed my advice

[The Onion @TheOnion]

Dark, Mysterious Forces Compel Woman To Work Out To ‘High School Musical 2’ Soundtrack https://t.co/wD0lCawbxC

[Mina Kimes @minakimes]

NFL twitter when a trick play works vs when it doesn’t

[Emerson Lotzia, Jr. @EmersonLotzia]

me 9 beers deep on christmas eve when my wife’s extended family walks in and i can’t remember a single name

[Carolyn Zacharias @heycarolynz]

Me to the wedding bartender as I come up for my 11th vodka soda

[J-L Cauvin @JLCauvin]

Removing George Santos combines two of the GOP's favorite things - pretending to have integrity and firing a gay person.

[cars.destroyed.our.cities @CarsRuinedCity]

If Fenway Park had to adhere to Wichita Kansas’ parking requirements.

Source: @the_transit_guy

[Dan White @atdanwhite]

The 19-year-olds who attend my favorite university didn’t score enough touchdowns today so I’m blacked out, facedown in the driveway. My wife is crying, begging me to come inside & sing Happy Birthday to my son. “Please just reverse the Rav4” I whisper into the concrete.