John Sweeney

hi what’s your moms email

[Joben @icebergs1mpson]

Got the friggin lettuce virus from 12 Guinness last night

[SHAQ @SHAQ]

wasn't lookin, but randy orton has da sexiest white man butt ive seen next 2 steve nash

[𝐌𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐏𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 @MikeFPrater]

No words needed ...

[John Sweeney @JohnSweeney27]

I find the shipping option on facebook marketplace abhorent. Do not rob me of the rush of being possibly murdered half hour away in a strangers home for a 20 dollar coors light poster

[Kevin Clark @bykevinclark]

Every other sport is absolutely desperate to generate stars and the NFL is like "The Giants have an Italian guy" and it's a national story. I love this sport. I love this country.

[SLUG @generalslug]

ever since i learned “the eagle always faces forward” is an official USPS slogan it’s been a near-constant struggle not to mutter it like a cryptic greeting to every mail carrier i see

[BrilliantlyDumb @RobbyBerger]

Just got matched up with a guy who told me to call him “The Duke”. Sometimes content is just handed to you on a silver platter

[Thomas White @len0killer]

Am I scared of microplastics? I don’t know. Does the archer fear his bow? Or does he kiss each arrow goodbye as it marries the wind

[Pluribus spoilers @odenhead]

The creativity of some people on the internet is incredible

[watersplasher101 @DrCameronFetter]

googling “Do tasmanian devils actually spin in real life” and you can see my IQ score ticking down like yugioh lifepoints

[Edward Stockwell @EdwardStockwell]

You never see these kings advertise. Just content to be in their own space, forever waging a cold war against each other with no shifting front lines. Respect.

[John Sweeney @JohnSweeney27]

no phone for my child. Only a stick and wheel like god intended

[John Sweeney @JohnSweeney27]

@kevin_santero

[Will Sennett @Senn_Spud]

{breaking up 25 second awkward silence on first date} World War 1 was insane