Junior Kimbrough

Single book of matches, gonna burn what’s standing in the way

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@sonyashea3

[𝐋𝐞𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐝 @Be_like_legend]

being a high functioning stoner is WILD because I’m not trying to “escape reality” - I simply want to soften the sharp edges of existing inside a brain that never stops fucking thinking.

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@lecternleader

[Rep. Jack Kimble @RepJackKimble]

Just a friendly warning. We don’t even make $200k per year in Congress despite working nearly 140 days. If we aren’t properly compensated, a lot of us will go to the private sector and you will be left with some real idiots in Congress.

[marqix ☆ @fwmarqix]

Me: sitting quietly in a tiny ramen shop.

Chef: Extra egg?

Me: Sure.

Chef nods with terrifying seriousness.

Friend: Congratulations.

Me: For what.

Friend: You've been chosen.

Me: By WHO.

Chef disappears into kitchen.

Entire staff suddenly start moving faster.

Me: Why did the atmosphere change.

Friend: You complimented the broth too sincerely.

Me: That's bad?

Friend: Now he must prove himself.

Me: This feels illegal.

Chef returns carrying a bowl that looks spiritually important.

Chef: Please.

Me: Why does this ramen have an aura.

Friend already taking photos: I've never seen him use that spoon before.

Me: WHAT SPOON?!

Old customer in corner whispers: "The dragon ladle..."

Me: absolutely not.

Chef watches silently while I take first bite.

long pause

Me: ...oh my God.

Chef closes eyes slowly like a warrior hearing good news from battle.

Random businessman starts clapping once.

Then the whole restaurant joins in.

Me: PLEASE STOP.

Friend wiping tears: He accepted you.

Me: IT'S NOODLES.

[Sound Dobad @SoundDobad]

You’re laughing?

She made him motorboat her during a performance review, and you’re laughing?

[Gilded Hiero @Fox_Beholder]

Jonathan Frakes 'Beyond Belief' clips played at half speed make him sound like a drunk dude at the bar

[BestofHxC @BestofHxC]

Crowdkill of the year goes to this guy hitting a dude with the John Lennon

[Prog Rock Songs @progrocksongs]

Angine de Poitrine - Sherpa

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@MattCouture5 @brandoelk

[Cigarette Nostalgia @CigsMake]

“Babe, I found a couch that would be perfect for our living room”

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@DerrickEvans4WV

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@fitnesscampus_

[Not Jerome Powell @alifarhat79]

ChatGPT in 2029 searching for the guy who’s still using the free version

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@insiliconot

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@Anarseldain

[cinesthetic. @TheCinesthetic]

The Thing (1982) recreated with Pingu. A crossover that never stops being funny.

[Ghost Host @TheGhostHost]

🩸 GIVEAWAY 🩸

Happy Friday the 13th, Horror Community! I'm giving away the Shout Factory Deluxe Edition Blu-ray collection, Jason Voorhees funko pop figure, and mask. You have 24 hours to enter! 🏕

To enter: Follow, Like, Repost! 🔪

End: March 14th, 12am EST 🕛

⬇️ Details ⬇️

No purchase necessary, one winner selected, only valid to ship to users within the United States of America (territories included), Mexico, and Canada. 🇺🇸 🇲🇽 🇨🇦

#FridayThe13th #Friday13th #FridayVibes #FridayFeeling #JasonVoorhees #CrystalLake #CampCrystalLake #Horror #HorrorCommunity #Horrortwt #HorrorFan #HorrorMovie #HorrorMovies #HorrorFam #HorrorFamily #PhysicalMedia #Bluray #Funko #Pop #FunkoPop #PopFigure #Vinyl #VinylFigure #Giveaway

[Junior Kimbrough @JuniorKimbrough]

@WhizBuckleyNFH @TLCplMax

[Łаηdrąćę Вureaմ @LandraceBureau]

Necessity is the mother of invention