Mary Thompson

If he misses you, he'll call. If he cares, he'll show it. If not, he can't be worth your time because you're obviously not worth his.

[Freda Trevino @mashanova_z]

Horror movies don't scare me. But eight missed calls from my mom does.

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

I've changed? No.. I just grew up. I stopped letting people push me around, I learned that I can't always be happy, I accepted reality!

[Shari Harrison @alya_gordo]

They should definitely have cell phone chargers in waiting rooms instead of magazines.

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

"Age is just a number" - Yeah well...Jail is just a room.

[Bella White @shaluev78]

Every day you will meet a moron; if you haven't met one today, tomorrow you'll meet two.

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

School Supplies: 1. Cellphone. 2. Charger 3. Headphones 4. iPod 5. Snacks 6. Homework. That I copied 7. Money

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

Looking down my timeline and thinking "Stfu." "You're ugly." "This bitch can't spell." "Who cares?" "Stop lying, when did i follow you?."

[Janet Goddard @1987_starshinov]

Never leave something good to find something better, because once you realize you had the best, the best has found better.

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

Dear new generation, The Lion King was during our generation, Just because it came out in 3D doesn't make it yours. Sincerely the 90s kids

[Sally Bowen @93Vseslava]

Skinny girls run the world because fat girls don't run.

[Gladys Rey @83Kuritsina]

Dear new generation, The Lion King was during our generation, Just because it came out in 3D doesn't make it yours. Sincerely the 90s kids

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

Me: "Dad, how does it feel having an awesome son?" Dad: "I don't know, ask your grandpa."

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

Throwing lamps at people who need to lighten up.

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

"My memory is so bad..." "How bad is it?" "...How bad is what?"

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

Best feeling ever: Waking up and seeing you still have a couple hours to sleep.

[Christina Hobson @bashtannikov88]

If I had a British accent, I'd never shut up. ;)

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

I'm Not Arguing. I'm Simply Explaining Why I'm Right.

[Mary Thompson @LDlenara]

Create your own Bermuda Triangle! Just surround yourself with a wife & two kids, then watch all your hopes & dreams mysteriously disappear!

[Kathleen Haugland @kisternaya1]

Sometimes being single is just a vacation from all the bullshit.