🇺🇸

ferda czar. sandwich doctor. @ChicagosMayor opp

[🇺🇸 @LJFerda]

My bitch so mental who even cares about my retardation

[SP @sspencerukk]

They’re calling it the most Friday Thursday on record

[🇺🇸 @LJFerda]

Unc is at Lolla and can confirm that juul is back

[eugyppius @eugyppius1]

Appear at a pride parade in leather fetish gear with your ass out: pro-social exercise of liberal freedoms. Make out with some woman in a park: Risk your job. There is a conservation of prudery; moving sexual license to some areas requires compensating crackdowns elsewhere.

[🇺🇸 @LJFerda]

@patrickbetdavid

[Adam Friedland @AdamFriedland]

The prophecy

[MK @mkliebmann]

Cristiano Ronaldo begged for hamburgers outside McDonalds. He’d never turn pro in America

Messi’s parents were factory workers. He’d never turn pro in America

Lalas went to boarding school. Failed to get into college until his dad made a call to Rutgers. He went pro in America

[Inbound Ike. @inboundike]

The Mayor’s Office and a complete inability to handle logistics: name a more iconic duo.

[Cranky Federalist @CrankyFed]

Your pub's flag isn't on the moon

[Republicans against Trump @RpsAgainstTrump]

Ronald Reagan: “You can go to live in France, but you cannot become a Frenchman…But Anyone, from any corner of the Earth, can come to live in America and become an American…This, I believe, is one of the most important sources of America's greatness.”🇺🇸

[felicity shagwell ੯‧̀͡⬮ ᡣ𐭩 @liIpochaco]

his sloppy ass fumbling out the front door like a resident evil villain

[DNP Sports @notthefakeDNP]

Pro shop guys when you ask them fuckin anything.

[kuz @kylekuzma]

Since when is a 6’9 wing who plays any role you ask, guards 1–5, shot almost 50% from the field and cares about defense a ‘throw‑in’? lol

[Russillo @ryenarussillo]

Get Fox more touches. He’s due!

[Captain Caleb @captaincaleb18]

Osama Bin Warren gets hired and 3 years later the Bears are moving to a new state 😭

[Russell Wilson @DangeRussWilson]

Thank You, Football.

Love, #3

[🇺🇸 @LJFerda]

It’s like this guy wants people to hate him 😂

[Chris Emma @ChrisEmma1]

Mayor Brandon Johnson on the Soldier Field game day traffic: "Let me tell you how bad it is — Bears vs. Packers, I'm at the game, we're losing. I decide to leave to beat the traffic. Before I get out of the footprint, the Bears had come back to win."

[Fitz🍀 @CheapSeats411]

Chicago, IL

[𒉭𓆏The Great Dane 𓆏𒉭 @thegreatdane269]

JUUL was the Saddam Hussein of the vape industry. It got absolutely brutalized by the government for flavors that “appealed to kids” (RIP Mango) just for every gas station to become infested with unregulated Chinese disposables that come in pastel colors and have flavors like “Willy Wonka bubblegum sugar delight”