Matt D. Olson

Sketch comedy heretic, doom metal zealot and freelance marine biologist. Parody account, not the real @Metalson. he/him

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

I’ve lost 100 followers since the election lol, I guess everyone’s leaving here.

https://t.co/PckZoUknrS

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

Just snapped both of my pinkie toes clean off trying to step into boxer briefs while my feet were wet.

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@Vladislava237 yes it is

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@NancyMace Okay, political career may be cooked Nancy, but what do you still have?

…That’s right! You have internet fame, everyone knows you as the nasty ass bean lady!

Yeah, from now on you’ll just lean into the bean thing!

Maybe do an interview show like Hot Ones but with beans? 🤔

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@Slephard1 @KingTargaryenn lollllll

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@KingTargaryenn if he was Arthur Dayne you know would’ve recognized him at the Winterfell feast?

fuckin’ everybody!

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@_youngcapalot @pewpiece are you in some kinda hurry for the fucking thing to end? smell the roses, embrace the pace!

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@ObviousElk @Is_Not_Brian cause you suck

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@DarerickDs @Is_Not_Brian if you don’t like rules, then you shouldn’t want there be a “don’t fuck with the banana guy” rule.

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@chlc3d @DougHenwood

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@ClarenceBeEatin @CruiseCrave oh no the Ari Aster movie was nauseating???

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@mamdanistery @gonzfathermd @CruiseCrave sheriffs?

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@sashaperigo if Steyer was sincere about any of the policiy positions he pretended to have, he would never have been a billionaire in the first place.

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@mustyoshi @stawpthattrain ai or no ai, we need communist revolution either way

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@visenfer The reason is that Arya Stark was not alive yet to give any of those Targaryen women permission to use her sword.

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@alphalicent How TF were they planning to carry the boar back to Kings Landing

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@Mid30sManhattan why, is it a musical?

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@YUNGJEFF this is like when when the 20 minute intro to a Sleep song finally ends and you’re about to hear the actual main riff.

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@Jonas_Ceika 9/11

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@esjesjesj shanks saves the day just by standing somewhere nearby and his energy just like fixes everything

[Matt D. Olson @Metalson]

@YUNGJEFF gives Oden a run for his money as the best dude who’s ever lived, actually