Toddler Nonsense

Amateur dad of a five-year-old ass hat and ten-year-old teenage daughter.

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

Interviewer: How well do you deal with stressful situations?

Me: I have two kids. One is a toddler.

Interviewer: Are you a multitasker?

Me: I have two kids.

Interviewer: how do you feel about working long hours?

Me: Are you even listening to me?

#dadlife #parenting

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@YouGotHeigld you guys asked for it, so I kinda made it happen. Thanks for the rundown of Blast from the Past!!

Keep up the great work!

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@ThatMummyLife Yeah, she's been asking a lot of follow up questions lately. I'm not a fan.

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@TwinzerDad Studied HR/ Business in college. Currently working logistics for the USAF.

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@MomHatter Ready for the frat house!

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

Just cleaned a skillet that looked like it was covered in cicada skins.

Then I remembered that @losey_dana tried cooking eggs.

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@the_fashionball

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@DadandBuried Anything Tom Cruise has ever been in. That's is all.

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@wylaina It's not unusual

[Darin @DadOfFiveKidz]

This dunk right here… insane 👀🤯 #NBAAAllStar #AaronGordon #SlamDunk

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@RealOMGDogs

[Whisman @WhismanSucks]

Wow. That’s beautiful.

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@DaddingAround Some sort of pipe boring/drilling jig?

Otherwise, it is more than likely a set prop from a new Saw movie. Amirite?

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@CrimeInSports I'm bummed "Favela Phoenicians" wasn't an option.

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@ICantEven01 @TrophyMomReject @mamasahotmess04 @mommajessiec @ChaosStyled @MamaBear2_0 @thevaginadiary @fireinmysoul_ @MissBellaKim

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@DuelingDragons9 @starringmichell SPIDEY?!?!?!?!

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@DuelingDragons9 @starringmichell

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

"Be a first rate version of yourself, instead of a second rate version of someone else." - Judy Garland

That's quite good advice.

[bert kreischer @bertkreischer]

Hanging out at @burtonsnowboard having a beer! #MuhSheen

[Toddler Nonsense @NonsenseToddler]

@DadOfFiveKidz @TwinzerDad Dude, that's the stuff that makes the world work. Better than laser swords and witchcraft. 😉

[Dad Bits @DadBits]

Wife: "Why do you have so many shoes in the mudroom?"

Me: "It's a mudroom. That's where you take off shoes."

Wife: "You don't need 3 pair there."

Me: "Um. You have 5 pair there."

Wife: "Yes but, yours are so big."