Not A Salmon

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[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@MPFed A slightly different response to those from PFEW, although they keep deleting their ones as soon as it starts getting too many replies they don't like.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@VodafoneUK Wifi calling is not available on my Samsung s21fe 5g. Tobi is useless, the help guides don't provide a solution, the online chat isn't working, 191 is not taking calls, and twitter dm left me hanging. 24yrs with Vodafone but now going to move provider.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@Se_Railway Please get some clear announcements made about what is happening as there is no communication with the increasingly frustrated crowds at St Pancas.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@UKCopHumour @Liv1204 I'm sure @MetTaskforce will honour @Liv1204 this way.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@TheBlackRatt Congratulations, only three and a bit years and I'll hopefully get one of those.
PS- isn't it bad when someone accidentally tweets about having their jaffa cakes stolen, from the wrong account on their phone ;-)

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@KerryAGodliman Go on @taskmaster And find your catchphrase, Bosh! Maybe you could get some kind of sponsorship or advertising with @BoschGlobal ?

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

.@DrRanj My 5 year old daughter Francesca absolutely loves you. Every time she sees you on the tv she shouts your name at the top of her voice! And she thinks you’re great on @bbcstrictly @BBCStrictly2018

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@SportsBreakfast @talkSPORT @DarrenBent Rubbish. He was warmly welcomed but his tactics are nonsensical, subs are ridiculous, and now he's turned on the fans, Calderwood telling fans to "F*** Off" has to be the final straw.

[Matt G @mattyg76]

@SportsBreakfast @DarrenBent Darren. Probably 1% of Villa fans cared he’d managed Blues. The Other 99% don’t enjoy his dire football, out dated tactics, strange substitutions, square pegs round holes, ostracizing of the fans (being called unintelligent) do you need anymore ??

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@SportsBreakfast @talkSPORT @Rupertbell I'm so tired of people saying he nearly got us promoted. We lost the playoff final because he was so negative. He keeps saying how good he was at getting teams up, but everything has changed apart from his tactics. Sorry but it's time for #BruceOut

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@AVFCOfficial Time for Bruce's Post Match Bingo: "My record speaks for itself" "we've had to build a new team" "too many individual errors" "Jedinak is good at CB" "The intelligent fans still like me"

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@Liv1204 I've read many of your tweets, this one made me well up. You should be proud of where you are and where you're going. You (through Twitter and the IAG) will save lives, probably directly, definitely indirectly. x

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@RealDMitchell That's one of the many songs that I can't sing to the correct tune thanks to I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue and the "one song to the tune of another" round.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@kentpoliceroads @metpoliceuk This is the reaction to a win, how bad will a defeat be? Everyone on the #ThinBlueLine must be dreading it.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@kentpoliceroads It's not the A2070 between Ashford and Hamstreet. Well worth a look most evenings about 7-9pm.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@UkUtd @NormanBrennan @metpoliceuk It's bonkers. Only it will be split into three areas, and there will be three radio channels. It's ok though, because it'll save money by having slightly more SMT and a few more PC roles (one of these will carry vacancies, guess which one)

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@policeconduct @metpoliceuk An atrocious decision based on nothing more than a desire to satisfy your political masters. Keep this up and as well as the growing number of officers handing in driving permits there will be no firearms officers.

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@anonyplod @Liv1204 Sometimes schools/teachers ask local SNT to go in, or local SNT offer their services -repeatedly until it's accepted in some cases ;-)

[Not A Salmon @NotASalmon1]

@anonyplod @Liv1204 Most primary schools do a part of year R on "people who help us" and parents are invited in to talk about their jobs, or local 999 services staff go in.

[Mr Sukjit Singh Sarai @SuttonMids2018]

#ToryBritain #Suttoncoldfield #Streetly
Gone in the last 7 years..

535 libraries
500 Sure start Children Centres
419 schools
103 NHS clinics
52 ambulance stations
35 fire stations
18 prisons
17 A&E wards
21,000 👮 officers
14,000 nurses