That one chick from the internet

If you can't find a clit in my header you'll never find one in its natural habitat. Published Urban Dictionary Author.

[That one chick from the internet @PrisonCookies]

I want to do hot girl shit but I can’t stop eating fat girl shit.

[The B. @anerdonfire2]

When its all falling apart, I'll be the one looting the bookstores.

[WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket]

Sit down, no one's ever called you Maurice.

[WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket]

vanilla loaf is my stripper name

[WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket]

I scream at rom coms like a football commentator

[WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket]

what's the best makeup to conceal my overall exhaustion and empty soul

[WittySassBasket™ @WittySassBasket]

I just want to be healthy enough to run for my life

[Shade 5 🎬 @Shader70]

The last thing I put in my wife's mouth was wedding cake.

[Shade 5 🎬 @Shader70]

Was going to blow all my Kohl's Cash on some new manties but they tended to ride up a bit.

[Shade 5 🎬 @Shader70]

Was that a blow job or a shark attack?

[Tony @tsm560]

Wow, look at that! Isn't it beautiful? Let's destroy it.*

*people

[Tony @tsm560]

When you lose the ability to laugh at yourself you become so much funnier to everyone else.

[Ghostface Kryllah @kryzazzy]

Shoes made of courage to help you walk the fuck away.

[Tony @tsm560]

You should be resting, bitch face

[Tony @tsm560]

*getting a blow job*

Did you cum yet baby?

[Ghostface Kryllah @kryzazzy]

Hey girl, don’t ever let anyone treat you like you’re the free breadsticks, you’re cheesy garlic bread, act like it.

[Tony @tsm560]

Reality is my escape from twitter

[Tony @tsm560]

We laugh at your stupid eyebrows so much