“I've got my kids (tattooed) on my right arm: Shannon, Caragh, Aidan and Leah… The wife did ask me why didn't I get hers and I said 'they'll always be my kids but you won't necessarily always be my wife,' which she wasn't too pleased about.” - Roy Keane
"To come out with a result like that, away from home, with little help, was brilliant. I mean to electrocute a man until he turns into a skeleton is something you don't see very often and he pulled it off perfectly. The bricks were a nice touch also." - Roy Keane on Home Alone 2
"His preparation was spot on today. The fact that he was outnumbered and physically weaker shows just how good his tactics were. I was particularly impressed with the blow torch and paint cans. Stroke of genius!" - Roy Keane on Home Alone 1
"If your plan is to steal Christmas then why would you go back on your word at the very last minute? His heart grew three sizes that day? Nonsense. If his heart really grew three times bigger he'd be dead. I'm not buying it." - Roy Keane on The Grinch
Roy Keane speaking about Jamal Musiala, who played for England, before rejecting them for Germany:
“It’s good that England have been given a taste of their own medicine. They took Rice & Grealish. Don’t get me started on that.”
Roy Keane on Newcastle: “I always thought they were an arrogant bunch, for a club that’s won f**k all. It wasn’t a bad place to play. As for the Toon Army, the Geordies, the hostile reception...I never fell for that crap.”