Riley Edgewood

Writer of sexy romance. ROCK & RELEASE + SURF & SURRENDER + TRUTH & TEMPTATION! Also a fan of planners & paper crafts. Frequent potty mouth. xo

[Riley Edgewood @RileyEdgewood]

#teasertuesday number two for Truth & Temptation :)

[A.R. Moxon 🦋 @JuliusGoat]

Women: We live in a constant state of vigilance because men pose a constant threat to us, here are literally millions of corroborating stories.

Men: What a scary time for men this is.

[Jon @ArfMeasures]

Me: Do you have the Harry Potter audiobook?
DJ: no

[The Hooburrito, a burrito by Hoobastank @sug_knight]

The strap on the back of crocs is so they stay on during sex

[Sooz @CruisinSoozan]

My birthstone is zucchini bread.

[Cam @GinAndJif]

Collective nouns:

A herd of cows
A school of fish
A flock of birds
A pack of wolves
A swarm of bees
A fuck that of spiders

[Denny’s @DennysDiner]

zoom in on the syrup

[SimonR @Simonreah]

Someone who works at a charity shop put Jeff Goldblum in every single photo frame 😂

[Abbie @AbbieEvansXO]

*battlefield turns into a giant orgy*

Cupid: sorry sorry, these are the only type of arrows I have

[Christopher Ashman @CAshmanActor]

[FIRST DAY IN THE MILITIA]

CORPORAL: How’s your bow-hunting skills?

ME: [Recalling the time I found a cool ribbon for my wife’s present] Excellent!

[Uncle Duke @UncleDuke1969]

"Here's Ted with the weather."
"..."
"I said... Here's Ted with the weather."
"..."
"Ted?"
"THAT's what an unanswered text feels like, Sue."

[Abam @AdamBroud]

Interviwer: You put on your resume that you're good at reading people

Me: *Doesnt look up from People magazine*

Interviewer: Oh wow

[m@thew @TweetPotato314]

[Argument at family dinner]

Wife: *Whispers to me* Don’t start taking sides this time.

Me: Why not? *sliding roast potatoes in pocket* They're too busy yelling to notice.