San Jose Police Dept Parody

Parody account of the most competent and anti-racist police department in America.

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

We need to wait for context and see the officers side of the story for why they were masturbsting inside this family’s home. #believecops

[Michael Bott @TweetBottNBC]

Exclusive: San Jose police officer on leave after being accused of masturbating inside a family's home during a call for service, according to multiple sources who spoke to NBC Bay Area.

It's been a tumultuous few weeks for officers within the department

https://t.co/4nlwiYZ1lx

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

just kidding we know that even if there were zero "crime" we could count on our buddy @sliccardo to keep the money flowing out of your pockets and into ours 🤑

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

thank you to our brave officers who shot the man who deescalated a gunman at a dtsj bar last night - if everyone in sj started taking action to keep each other safe then what would happen to our job security??

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Long story short, SJPD officers shot the black man responsible for saving lives and successfully de escalating a dangerous situation. You can always count on sjpd to shoot first and ask questions later.

[San José Police Media Relations @SJPD_PIO]

Tomorrow Chief Mata will provide additional details on the homicide and Officer involved shooting that occurred downtown over the weekend during a press conference.

This is a body worn camera still of what our Officer encountered.

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Thanks for supporting us no matter what Sam

[Sam Liccardo @sliccardo]

None of us want to be the person to decide—in a fraction of a second— whether to pull that trigger, but the burden of making that decision falls upon the police officer. 3/3

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

awesome to see progressive @RoKhanna supporting military aid and colonialism in occupied Palestine! hook us up with that tech from Israel so we can terrorize marginalized communities! violating human rights #athome and #abroad !

[Jacob Magid @JacobMagid]

Before landing in Israel hours ago, @RoKhanna spoke w/ @TimesofIsrael about how he looks to Israel for inspiration for his vision to expand tech & innovation to marginalized US populations; discussed where he sees the Democratic Party heading on Israel https://t.co/j14rWsNSCW

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Shout out to our PR department! Thanks for always making us look good @SJPD_PIO

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

@LAPDParody keep up the great work!

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

i guess someone has been reading our employee handbook! #goodstudent

[Mayor Mayor @shr00mali3n]

@SJPDParody tf is a "routine car stop"? harass people who've been incarcerated?

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

tap in if you need some tree📲👀

[Paul Joseph @SJPD_AC_Joseph]

A Southern Division Midnight Patrol officer made a "routine" car stop last night. The driver, a convicted felon, had two loaded pistols (one stolen), body armor, and marijuana possessed for sales.

Guns, drugs, and body armor possessed by a felon. Routine, indeed!

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Even though weed is legal in California, we continue to make arrests of individuals who sell! #justice #stoners

[San José Police Media Relations @SJPD_PIO]

What seems to be an almost every day occurrence…while most of the city was sleeping our Officers were out keeping you safe.

Great arrest Officer! 🚔

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Absolutely amazing how our state of California is actively funding and recruiting young POC to be corrections officers! Great alternative pathways to success!
https://t.co/432VP4aAat

[California Big City Mayors @CABigCityMayors]

Watch seven of the mayors of California's biggest cities join @CalVolunteers Chief Service Officer @JoshFryday to announce the #CaliforniansForAll Youth Jobs Corps here: https://t.co/ztd2lHxwdZ

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Oakland Mayor Libby said it best! Let's, "bring young people that have grown up in our community to pursue law enforcement"
Love having young POC on our force so we can put them on the front covers of our brochures as they terrorize their own people #diversity

[California Big City Mayors @CABigCityMayors]

Watch seven of the mayors of California's biggest cities join @CalVolunteers Chief Service Officer @JoshFryday to announce the #CaliforniansForAll Youth Jobs Corps here: https://t.co/ztd2lHxwdZ

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

what can we say, we love supporting the non-profits that help us criminalize actual activists and lobby for big budgets!🤑 #grassroots #SELFMADE

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Great job Sam! Let’s continue to use gun laws to criminalize black and brown people while making sure white supremacists and mass shooters (same thing tbh) have open access. High five bro @sliccardo

[Sam Liccardo @sliccardo]

My complete statement on tonight's City Council vote on my Gun Harm Reduction proposals ⬇️

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Thank you to @SupOttoLee for completely contradicting himself and supporting the new jail!

[SV De-Bug @svdebug]

2 weeks ago @SupOttoLee co-authored a Resolution to “declare mental health and substance abuse a public health crisis.”

The idea being that we shouldn’t incarcerate health issues.

So why today did he push the county to build a new jail?🤦🏾‍♂️

Resolutions are for show only.

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

We could never incarcerate as many black and brown people without the support of people like @SupOttoLee! Thanks for your support for the new jail bro

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

So proud to see some ladies join sjpd. Girl boss, gatekeeper, terrorize the community! @SJPDRecruiting #DiversityandInclusion

[San José Police Media Relations @SJPD_PIO]

Today 25 new recruits joined our ranks. Academy training is done. Field training is next.

Among the grads, 9 women, 7 different ethnicities, and 5 other languages spoken. Proud of our diversity.

Be safe youngsters.

🚔👮🏻👮🏼👮🏽‍♂️👮🏻‍♂️💙

[San Jose Police Dept Parody @SJPDParody]

Kill your neighbors and criminalize your community! Join SJPD! @SJPDRecruiting

[San José Police Media Relations @SJPD_PIO]

2/ Be part of the team:

https://t.co/DJ4no8FaLj

@SJPDRecruiting