sad cowboy

CEO of (crying into) myPillow. top 2% skim milk

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

me (on the oregon trail): my tummy hurts

[cory @coolmathgame_]

[doctor hands my wife our newborn son] congratulations

my wife: do u want to hold him

me: yes [picking him up and gently cradling him until i start to cry] wow. he’s so precious

doctor: put me down

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@jbfan911 what's ur venmo?

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@JackWilliamRtF oh maybe now the republicans will stop being so proud to claim him

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@rissaoffline @DuckDuckGo that was quite a rollercoaster

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@carterhambley no shit?

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

if we ban brazil can we also ban brazil nuts? get tf outta my mixed nuts u bland ass woodchips

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@JackWilliamRtF who cares about time sync when it's in DOLBY

[nolen @itseieio]

At the height of One Million Checkboxes's popularity I thought I'd been hacked. A few hours later I was tearing up, extraordinarily proud of some brilliant teens.

A thread about my favorite story from running OMCB....

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

pokemon be like

[kelly @BoyYeetsWorld]

kelly

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@JackWilliamRtF tell her that's a phone not a lamp

[Herschel Pennymacker @pennymacker]

Mom has dementia and I have Photoshop and she’s so proud of her astronaut son.

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@badboychadhoy @gleekoftheday https://t.co/xV02PUhG8l

[Cadmium Enjoyer 𓅃 @thermo_vending]

More man made horrors

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@ben_rosen kevin appier

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

pokemon hawk tuah the polls

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

gabezo

[mr spinch ! @mooninfirst]

gabezo

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@violinbee01 i literally just listed ours on craigslist today :(

(the wraps were pre rowling going off the rails)

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@emptytesticles i think every mall is going out of business! i moved on to memory foam skechers after these and never looked back. until the wife got me kiziks... now im hooked lol

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@badboychadhoy mr wife guy over here

[sad cowboy @SaddestCowboy_]

@jbfan911 i love mr worldwide!