Shrub Rocketeer

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[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

Superb impression of Darren Cann by Harry Kane

#MEXENG

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@OtuScouting @David_Ornstein @TheAthleticFC No. He’s not saying that.

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@CheshireCuntass @Lightenerrthang @BenjaminABoyce What an adorable message

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@CraigDHoare @DanielHussey2 Yeah, the jury of idiots.

At this point, an ex-footballer making such a statement points to him having a personal issue rather than speaking objectively.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@kieranpower30 @Daniel28Wright @DanielHussey2 The exact same pressure applied to both penalties against France because each were to level the match.

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@dunglewantiktok @dheller91 Yeah, penalties aren’t real goals. Those other players have never scored penalties, either.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@dunglewantiktok @33monteirao I’d get a refund on your brain if I were you…

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@Ayhd126H @abux5603 Zero point trying to reason with someone whose brain was switched with a damp flannel years ago

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@son_of_uki @thatniggarhodes Quick maths 💡

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@berndveiga @SahotaUTD @FinBogasson11 Anyone attempting to diminish Kane’s season (or any player for that matter) by arguing that “goals and assists don’t mean shit” is clearly at the lower end of single-digit IQs

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@danpatfraz @PavlovicEra_ Ironic use of a clown emoji.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@ColinPr61915188 @UtdTopCee Scored in the last 7 Champions League matches in a row. One of the UK’s finest minds thinking he hasn’t performed in any big game.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@Jambo_Bradley @GeronimoMorgans A dumb, trendy word used by sheep that’ll phase out in a few months. In this context, they’re saying Haaland is dominating Gabriel.

[Justin🦩Boldaji @justinboldaji]

Telling everyone how impressive my first gay bareback orgy was

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@MichaelAvinou @eabrahams10 @vkon1 Oh, sorry, so you're only including the matches in which he doesn't score to make your point? In that case, you're spot on.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@MichaelAvinou @eabrahams10 @vkon1 Hmmm

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@ArsenalN7 Speed and acceleration stats being nearly identical - when it’s proven that van de Ven is the fastest Premier League player since records began six years ago - is interesting.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@bloodylikeab0dy @knowncougar Most American and British accents are non-rhotic, so Rs following vowels are dropped: car, letter, etc.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@_Steve_B_ @BBCSport Yeah, all those tap-ins with his weak foot from outside the box.

[Shrub Rocketeer @ShrubRocketeer]

@bloodylikeab0dy @knowncougar Every English-speaking nation has inconsistencies with pronunciation, but this might be the first critique I’ve seen where pronouncing a word almost exactly as it’s spelt is considered the “wrong” way (especially given the R is silent).