OG Saint Augustine

Christ called me to be in da hood but not of da hood, homies. (Parody: not actually St. Augustine tho)

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

WARNING: sometimes mah phone autocorrects Satan to "Stan."

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

"how do you stay positive?" Ppl ask me

Easy fam u ever heard of the donut man?

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

oh shoot there is a lotta blasphemy up in here

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

yawn sup just awoke from an ecumenical nap whats good Twitter fam

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

U ever walk up to a church and say "hey sup u look Lutheran like sum1 just flipped a booking longboat over and said 'let's do church in here'"

I have def popped sum architectural trunk on Mah swedish reformed homies in mah time

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

#tbt to dat time I rolled up on Luther when he tried to ax Hebrewsv from the Bible.

Glad I could talk the homie down.

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

I'm offended by strawberry bread

Y won't it txt me back

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

I read a book

It was the Bible

Das not a joke

Lol but if u laughing it kinda is

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

I feel like it's Leviticus up in here

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

omg i can't do dat feat of puzzlin.

Plz don't eat me fam.

Show mercy.

[Kaitlin Ruiz @Kaitlin_M_Ruiz]

Deeply troubled by the eating of octopuses (or octopodes, if you like). If a fella can probably solve a Rubik’s cube when the mood strikes him, he’s not for eating.

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

@fredsprinkle @ebruenig HOMILIES TO MAH HOMIES AND LITURGIES TO MAH LADIES

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

Just wanna say hey.

To Gog.

Ur goin down bruh.

Stay outta mah hood.

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

Werk heartily fam. #laborday #inspirations

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

The story of mAh immortality is another long story it involves a science experiment and I'm still kinda bitter bout it

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

BTW I'm og but I'm also kind of immortal k I knew St Labor he was a good kid glad he has a day when ppl grill stuff

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

And the YP says "no I swear it on St. Labor's grave man!"

And I tell him the story of St Labor and how he knew not to lie to me

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

He sez "I know it was a Komodo bc salamanders have bigger scales"

And I'm like

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

And I b like "how did you know it was a Komodo dragon fam how u know it wasn't just one of dem big Japanese salamanders mm?" (Testing him)

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

He sez "no no a Komodo dragon showed up and offered me dis cup bein like 'its just a latte wit sum molasses in it here have it for free fam"

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

An I tell the YP "you either don't know ur Bible or ur tryna git me to believe a talking reptile tricked you like a whip"

[OG Saint Augustine @StOGistine]

Did he repent? Naw he goes deeper b saying, "NO THE SERPENT DECEIVED ME THO"