Brian Hahn

Rebellious Integrity - No reason; just seems so pleasin - Luke 12:35-37
Social media was a mistake.

[Brian Hahn @TheBrianHahn]

I was raised by good parents and a shitload of George Carlin.

[7/11 Truther @DaveMcNamee3000]

New Study Shows Women Prefer When Their Partners Speak Minionese During Sex

[Jenni @hashjenni]

Capitalism is better than socialism because one man gets to be a trillionaire instead of everyone having healthcare

[Hannibal Buress @hannibalburess]

They'd have a better shot with Popovich coaching with a bell like the old guy from Breaking Bad.

[Jon Favreau @jonfavs]

Elon Musk held up a chainsaw, fed USAID into the wood chipper, and at least 600,00 people have already died as a result - two-thirds of them children.

History's first trillionaire.

[Jeff Timmer @jefftimmer]

The Face Merkin

[Marco Foster @MarcoFoster_]

Jon Stewart: “This is a euthanasia that’s being done to CBS News. They brought in Bari Weiss with a giant pillow to just be like I think I can smother this fucking thing. Let me get it small enough to throw out the window”

[Brian Hahn @TheBrianHahn]

Fuck that. We’re taking it back.

[Ben Dreyfuss @bendreyfuss]

one of the problems with the far left being so “blame America” and libs being uncomfortable with public displays of patriotism is that you then end up with national pride being exclusively coded as right wing, but in reality everyone but the extreme far left/right is patriotic

[Dr. StormyWaters @NormanDodd_knew]

He is bailing out Sam Altman. OpenAI cant IPO because they are massively in debt and dont make any money so Altman runs to the White House begging for a bailout and magically 3 days later we get this.
This is the TARP bailouts all over again lol
How "rich" did we get after '08

[Peter Kafka @pkafka]

Go back in time and tell your 2015 self that this paragraph will run in the New York Times in 2026.

[Tom Brennan @Brennanator]

“Liz Lemon, this is Dan Houseman.”
“It’s Danhausen.”
“Whatever his name is, I gave him 5 dollars to curse Martin Lawrence in 1996 and I’ve been on top ever since”

[Hunter Biden @HunterBiden]

To everyone so eager to cancel someone for a tattoo they got at age 22, a drunk text, a selfie they took in the middle of a mental health crisis:

Show us your laptop.
Show us your iCloud.
Open your entire digital life to your worst enemy. No context. No filter. No explanation.

You won’t.

You won’t because you know what I know. Any one of us, frozen at our worst moment, photographed in our lowest hour, looks like a monster. Looks like a stranger. Looks like someone who deserves to be cast out.

That is not who we are.

My mom and baby sister were killed in a car accident when I was just a kid. Cancer took my brother Beau, my best friend and my rock. I battled alcoholism. I battled addiction. I chose the coward’s way out more times than I can count.

For years I believed the defining chapters of my life were written by tragedy, loss, and shame.

I no longer believe that.

Pain can shape us. Loss can humble us. Failures can leave scars that never fully fade. But none of them have the authority to define us.

And it sure as hell ain’t the critic that counts.

That authority belongs to us alone-the person in the arena.

Every setback presents a choice. Play the victim, or cut the bullshit and take ownership for who we become next.

Life does not determine our character. It reveals it.

Again and again we are asked the same question. When shit happens, what next?

We are not defined by what happened to us. We are not defined by the worst photo, the worst text, the worst tattoo, the worst night. We are defined by the person we choose to become. And by the courage to choose that person, every single day.

So before you reach for the gavel - show us your laptop.

You won’t.

The whole world saw mine. And I am still here. Still becoming. Still choosing. Still standing.

That is the only definition that matters.

[Spookydood 🎃 @spookydoodyt]

It’s so funny people think ChatGPDisney is going to end this movie with the triumphant defeat of the dastardly iPad instead of the ultra obvious “what if… there’s a balance 🥹”

[Steve Morris @stevemorris__]

They expect us to believe these results and not ask questions 🙄

[Ernie Tedeschi @ernietedeschi]

HOW CONVENIENT THAT THE LATE POINTS FAVORED THE KNICKS.

[Zack Stentz @MuseZack]

Modern day My Fair Lady, only it's Benedict Cumberbatch teaching a Gen Z American starlet how to drop the vocal fry and enunciate clearly.

[Matt Kramer 🔪 @kramerposts]

not sure if anyone will ever beat this two-tweet combo

[Secular Talk ([email protected]) @KyleKulinski]

I think I broke this woman

[Centrism Fan Acct 🔹 @Wilson__Valdez]

So old I remember when inflation was literally the only thing the media talked about. Despite the US objectively having the best post-covid recovery in the world, the coverage was just searingly negative. Human interest stories of family's 'suffering.'

And now this will barely be a blip in the news cycle.

[Sgt Blackout 🫡 @coldcallsniper]

He’s a McDonalds sprite away from shredding his passport and starting a new life here