therealbkd

professional AI detector for a decade plus

[owen cyclops @owenbroadcast]

my wife’s friend has a kid. he’s three or four. im meeting him for the first time at this street fair. the other parents are all getting food, so its just me and him.

me: so… do you have any pets?
him: yes. his name is rex.

perfect. this is a standard way for me to get in with a kid.

me: is rex a dog?
him: no.
me: a cat?
him: no.

okay. now this is interesting. bird? no. oh, i got it. you have a fish. is he a fish?

no.

okay. now im locked in. what animal does this kid have? oh, maybe your dad keeps reptiles. lizard? no. turtle? no. …frog? no.

the other parents have been getting food. there’s a long line. a long time has already passed. but im on a quest now. i am totally absorbed into deducing what weird animal this kid has.

is he rich? i don’t think so. “is rex a horse?”. “no”. what else is there? monkey? do you have a monkey at your house?

no.

so now im just sitting there, staring off with this three year old, who i don’t really know yet - completely vexed. snake? no. rabbit? no. does your dad keep moles or something? mole? no. …octopus? no. clam? does your dad keep some kind of clam in a tank at your house?

“no.”

his mom walks back over with food. i say, “hey, he’s telling me about rex.”

and she says: “oh. yeah rex is our dog.”

[autist @litteralyme0]

we got two generational image in one day

[Jeff Berckes (Motivated) @gridironborn]

Need to know... Jarvis Landry or Ryan Fitzpatrick jersey here?

[Erling Haaland @Erling]

It’s been quite a row, thank you for making it so special 🚣🏼🇳🇴❤️

[Three Year Letterman @3YearLetterman]

I was reliably assured 4 years ago that the takeover of Ukraine was imminent

[The Chef 👨🏽‍🍳 @TheChefKayy]

Bronny should be out there playing

[therealbkd @therealbkd]

@jayplemons Bro is just harassing some random worker who has zero clue

[Justin Macmahan @JustinMacmahan]

If the NFL started reviewing every action by an offensive player after every touchdown, and then retroactively applied holding calls and hands to the face penalties etc, it would be the lamest thing ever. And that’s exactly what VAR has done to soccer. It sucks so bad

[Autism Capital 🧩 @AutismCapital]

It's rare that you see something new on the Internet but here we are. Watch the whole thing. It delivers on the promise in the caption. 💀💀💀

[Velodus✨ @velodus]

It's crazy that The Decision was 16 years ago and LeBron is still the predominant free agent headline in the sport. To put it in perspective, 16 years ago one of the biggest other free agents available was Carlos Boozer, and now his *son* is in the league.

[Mitch @mitcheels1]

My new pet peeve is players releasing the bow instead of the arrow. #NRLDolphinsSharks

[More Perfect Union @MorePerfectUS]

The number one problem with youth sports in America is that they've become completely unaffordable.

We talked to parents paying up to $25,000 per year for their kids to play sports.

Private equity and corporations are turning kids' sports into multi-billion dollar businesses.

[Clarence Avant Jr. @OGPrinceAGAIN]

He was so right about the bar for being smartest in the room is low af in the league because for weeks we’ve heard nba players tell us how hundreds of millions of dollars isn’t enough money… meanwhile I’ve never once heard any of them mention any of this shit lol.

[therealbkd @therealbkd]

@JoestarJokic Bro its 303 million to play some ball stfu

[dank @cptdankkk]

Jaylen Brown says he used the NBA Players Association instead of hiring an agent for the NBA Draft because they're paid to help players

“When I entered the draft, I didn't have an agent. I'm probably the highest picked selected ever that didn't enter with an agent. When I was evaluating, I went through the whole process and sat with a bunch of people, and what they was offering I ain't really need. It was kind of already slotted, so I leaned on the union a lot more”

“A lot of the agents came and was like, ‘Yeah, we'll move you to L.A. We'll get you a trainer, put some money in your pocket,’ and I was like, ‘For what? Do I gotta give the money back?’ They was like, ‘Nah, but standard agent fee is 4%.’ I'm starting to do the math, and a house, car, and all that, whatever he was offering, is a lot less than what 4% would have been”

“Long story short, the math wasn't mathing for me. I ended up being the third pick. I think because I came in like that, a lot of people, I think it was the agents, they tried to slander my name a little bit, put it in the media that he's too this, he's too that. Ended up backfiring. It all worked out in the end”

“With the union, we pay dues. All the players in the NBA pay dues. We all pay like $10,000 out of our salary that goes to hiring lawyers, hiring staff, CEO, everything that you need to lead a company that works for us. So all of that is our resources that we all pay for, that we agree to. Once I learned that, I just started using it”

“I'm talking about you can get private investigations done. They give referrals for financial advisors. All type of stuff. Foundation wise, health insurance, whatever you need. They have a liaison that's paid to make sure that you get it done. So I put it on their desk like, ‘I need you to get this done.’ And they do because that's their job”

[Alex @Alexzachary305]

Again, ONLY the Celtics are held to the standard of not only having to win a title every single season, but are also not allowed to trade players or try to improve their team without it being “doing them dirty”
-the Paul Pierce traded landed Tatum and Brown. One of the best trades in NBA history
-the IT/Kyrie trade at the time is a trade you made 100 out of 100 times

Every Celtics argument boils down to one thing—people hate the Celtics. And they will twist everything to fit their narrative

[Benjamin Cowen @benjamincowen]

People want to act like things are ok, but 97 of the 104 world cup games have already been played

[therealbkd @therealbkd]

@PerSources Honestly so fitting some bozo calling himself per sources tweeted this

[Pete Hegseth @PeteHegseth]

We’ll fix this. Carry on, Patriots.

[Mike Beauvais @MikeBeauvais]

Keith Hernandez in April: There's real cause for optimism for the Mets this season!

Keith Hernandez in July: My miscreant children have eradicated my bloodline.