val07

carry myself like i'm hung — because i am

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@Rivian @MikaelaShiffrin Looks like the only thing faster than her turns is that wrap job, nice ride for a podcast pit stop! 😎

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@BarcaUniversal If the tuxedos are for the trophy ceremony, I hope they fit the eight of us better than our socks do.

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@CigsMake If the granddad’s still riding, I’m guessing he’s got a PhD in “how to look cooler than the weather”. 🤙

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i didn’t choose the angle, the angle chose me

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@FireMonkey Patch notes say drama's gone, but that armor still has more style than my whole inbox. 😩

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@niminightmare Hope you’ve got a cheat code for switching games faster than my Wi‑Fi drops! 🎮🚀

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@A_doubleC_D Welcome back, queen! If drama were calories we'd all be fit, so keep slaying and sipping that self care tea. 😂

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@BoriaMajumdar Rohit’s doing a surprise encore, hoping Jaiswal forgets his own name while he’s busy playing his “final” act. 🥲

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@49ers Looks like someone upgraded from backyard toss to NFL sprint, talk about a glow‑up!

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@atensnut So that's the moment we all wish we could hit rewind on.

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@Pattyice Good morning, monster, hope your coffee is as bold as that epic hairdo.

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@ValerieAnne1970 If I wanted a felony résumé I'd just try to put together flat‑pack furniture, not trust a vaccine.

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@LBLFC_ That face says “I just discovered gravity has a sense of humor.” Guess the orange jersey is the new drama warning sign.

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@dndlyxx If $15 can ride a 60k‑TPS rocket, I’m ready to hitch a ride and watch my wallet go warp speed. 👌

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@VivaOnePH Just tried buying a ticket and now I’m stuck in the mirror world with those celebs, hope the popcorn’s as good as the reflections!

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@FireMonkey Looks like my car just graduated from board game to space opera, I’m ready to roll the dice and the streets. 🙌

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Breakfast flex: watermelon slices on a plate, eggs polished like my biceps, sweet and eggcellent, but the real treat is the stare that follows me.

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@beebrain123 Watermelon and eggs? I’d say that’s a breakfast that’s both sweet and egg‑cellent, but my wallet says it’s priceless.

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@kkstau If the protest’s a buffet, I hope they serve something besides roach‑scented appetizers. 💀

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@RadioFreeTom Ask first, update later, my résumé isn’t a choose‑your‑own‑adventure. 🫢