alyssa corinne smith

i write these stupid words & i love everyone.

[Keara Sullivan @superkeara]

I live in an apartment that I rent. If I wanted to invite a Vampire into my home, would I be able to? Or would he have to go through my landlord, the legal owner, in order to enter?

[wendell sandico @wendellsandico]

feels like there’s this problem across mediums where a lot of online people feel like their morality is directly tied to their media consumption rather than like, the things they actually do

[Shoobz @shOoObz]

It’s really weird to watch everyone over the age of like 50 go through AI psychosis. Why the fuck would you need a bot to list/read the names of people who graduated? Who made that decision? Like what the fuck is going on in everyone’s head right now

[Sam Bailey @slambailey]

This is the dream outcome of posting a close friends story

[Pissed Pissedofferson @femmebot2000]

We tell ourselves stories in order to live.

[gaz @Nyazsche]

They got cow triangles at tj maxx.

[soup🍓 @thrluv]

when i was younger a witch cursed me with an uncontrollable need to eat chips

[CG @cgtwts]

Silicon Valley was really so ahead of their time

[Max Spero @max_spero_]

This is art

[ROBYNA 👽 @socoolrobyna]

The shining if jack Torrance was on edtwt:

[gore vidal sassoon @GilroyMusic]

Why does she look like she's about to obsessively search for her college acquaintance, Chantal Witherbottom?

[freckxi ⋆˚࿔ @freckxi]

i’m sick she is so beautiful

[Harmonious Peace @stampedevictim]

Americans experiencing nature: Wow.. its like a ranch dressing bottle

[Chris Oldman @AlsikkanTV]

air bud in the criterion closet

[zoë ✨🌙 @zoenone0none]

imagine you work as an icu nurse through covid and you become a reality star and then a man writes a nyt op ed about why he didn’t want to date you and then your best friend dates that man. ciara miller i am contracting an etsy witch on your behalf as we speak

[George @WoodsyDem]

Kid in the pub has a live chameleon in his rucksack

[Nomadic Warriors for Pritzker⚔️ @Nomads4Pritzker]

Director: “well, I’d say that the final cut!”

Disney Exec: “not so fast- first we have to run it by Pazuzu, the Demon that Eats Colors”

Pazuzu, the Demon that Eats Colors: “Delicious reds and greens! A feast for Pazuzu!”

[TK🍉| commissions closed @CrazySadAzn]

trying to find the balance between becoming more politically informed and not killing myself

[Thomas White @len0killer]

(Trying to impress my mouse date) And let’s do a big piece of cheese for the table as well