erythroc

[faget83629031852 @faget9261530128]

My ceiling fan just fell on my head and then someone shot me in the stomach and then a bear mauled me to death

[dracula flow @draculafl0w]

That pussy got me screamin, cryin, pissin, shittin, shootin ropes

[Brendan Fraser Crane @bf_crane]

Body count is not something I ask about when dating. After we’re married I’ll just treat her dexterity as unspoken backstory, like a monk who seems familiar with the blade

[black pepper cracker @__angoose]

Pioneering the “Irish Hello” where I turn up unannounced to a friend’s location

[erythroc @_erythroc]

at the grimchud conference

announcement blares, klaxons ringing,

"3PM. SENSORIUM. BLEAKHONS VS DIREFOIDS. BE THERE OR BE SQUARE."

[Handsome B. Charming @CTachio83984]

next time i see you i will be drunk as fuck...i promise you that, take my hand ,

[jane ester @cosmug]

id be huffing and puffing that shit like crazy. race to the end. theres no way im letting some broad take half my fucking cigarette

[Kyle Kushblasta @SkinnyTuna]

why did they invent a pill that makes you text your ex? and why did they make chemically pure black market versions of that pill One dollar?

[Apollo🌊 @odeiodissociar]

@ageofrealest

[disc ※ @arabelladevine]

your manic episode was very touching. i was moved

[Denji @REALESTCHAINSAW]

Dog wanted me to stay A sexless version so Bad he Genuinely killed himself and sent me Back into Poverty

[juju @vampsapire]

aquela amiga que não conseguiu dormir então vai ter que passar o dia assim

[لا حولَ @Idgafwarvet]

It’s think of me thursday can you please fucking think about me bro

[Basil 🌱 @Basil_Mage]

Let me put on my thinking cap

[femcellord @femcellord]

jerkin it banban zaza mode with style and precision

[WH @hastifliche]

This was it: the first day of junior high. I burst into Mr. Milson's math class like fragments of semi-molten copper piercing the exterior of a humvee outside the Green Zone and shredding the US diplomatic personnel within. It was going to be a great year.

[cav empty @cavempty_]

she let me hit because she has let me hit for generations in an infinite number of past lives in the karmic cycle. sometimes as four horned antelopes, as a speck of pollen on a bluebell flower, or even as algae surrounding hydrothermal vents on the deep sea floor