Mia🍀

Fan account

[mubiouš @Mubarak_mubious]

Boss: “Pack your things. You’re done here.”

Me: “Sorry, what?”

Boss: “Your employment is terminated. Poor performance.”

Me: “Poor performance? My department exceeded every target this quarter.”

Boss: “I’m not interested in excuses.”

Me: “I brought in our biggest client and managed their entire account.”

Boss: “That doesn’t make you irreplaceable.”

Me: “You’re firing me five minutes before our contract renewal meeting?”

Boss: “The meeting will continue without you.”

Colleague: “Maybe this will teach you to be more humble.”

Me: “I’ll keep that in mind.”

Boss: “Security will escort you out.”

Me: “Can I at least send one final email to the client?”

Boss: “No. All client communication must go through management.”

Me: “Understood.”

I packed my laptop, returned my access card and walked toward the door.

Boss: “I hope you’ve learned that nobody is bigger than this company.”

Me: “One question. Who will handle the contract renewal?”

Boss: “I’ll take care of it.”

Me: “Have you read Section 14?”

Boss: “That’s not your concern anymore.”

Me: “Fair enough.”

[Chloe @Iamchloe8_]

A woman can forgive you in bed for:

• A small d!ck
• Cumming in 2 minutes
• Socks on

❌ She cannot forgive you for:

[T2 @UTDtwo]

🚨 BREAKING: Sir Alex Ferguson explains why Manchester United will STILL not sign players despite appointing Mauricio Pochettino:

“Not again. Just yesterday, a fan saw me and said, ‘Sir Alex, now that we’ve got Pochettino, we’re finally signing players, right?’

“He was so excited. I just smiled and waved at him.

“I couldn’t bring myself to tell him the truth.

“Many of you fans have no idea how this club is being run. There was a time I was just as optimistic as you.

“But one thing I know for sure is that Manchester United is no longer the club I once managed.

“We are drowning in financial debt.

“The owners have made it clear that sorting out the club’s finances is now more important than improving the squad.

“That means no big signings. No transfer spending spree. We’ve simply got to make do with what we have.

“But here’s the funniest part.

“Do you know why we actually agreed to appoint Mauricio Pochettino?

“Because he was the ONLY manager willing to take the job without demanding new signings!

“Every other manager we approached wanted transfer guarantees, new players and all sorts of promises.

“But let’s be honest, where exactly do you expect Manchester United to get that money from?

“Mauricio was willing to work with what we’ve got, so we gave him the job.

“Forget your transfer rumours, lads. We’re not shopping this summer. We’re just hoping what we have is enough.”

[Baba eleja🐟🐖 @Biodun_OG]

She is speaking Capanese🧢😂

That man set her up cos he knew she was lying.

Shawty don't speak no French talmbout je m'appelle 😂😂

And that other bro is at the wrong show. He needs to be at the UN office😂

[BROODAJOHN @BruudaJohn]

Some men stinks so bad, what could make any man birth from a woman descend to this?.

[Ronie @Ronieutd]

Excluding Alvaro Morata And Michael Essien

Name a player that has played for Ac Milan and Chelsea

Level: VERY HARD

[DG888 @dagreat888]

She turned it around and made herself the victim... women are incredible man

[ApTora @ApTora_]

people don't necessarily adopt crypto because they love blockchain technology

they adopt it when it makes something they already do more accessible @deficom

https://t.co/GlHE8ny5Xb wants to build around how people actually use funds in their daily lives

getting paid, paying bills, sending funds home.

these are everyday financial needs, and making them accessible to handle is what matters imo.

[Rx. @rxendy]

Leonardo DiCaprio, 51, and Sadie Sink, 22, are reportedly sparking romance rumors after being spotted returning from a late-night date, smiling and holding hands.

That 29-year age gap is already going to have the internet talking. 👀

[Shee @Its_shee_]

Fashion, elegance and Beckham energy! ❤️ David & Victoria never miss. Who remembers this 2007 look? 👀

[Jennin @Jennin8_]

You're not ugly my brother, you're just poor!🥹

[Abu Jawad @Abu_Jawaadd]

CEO: Michael, before we discuss anything, I want to ask HR a question.

HR: Yes, sir.

CEO: How long has Michael been eligible for promotion?

HR: Sir, his promotion was recommended last year, but it wasn’t approved.

CEO: By whom?

HR: It was held at departmental level, sir.

CEO: That’s interesting. Because I personally approved his promotion 18 months ago.

[@donzuley @Don_zuley]

Is Dwayne Johnson really sick?

[James @Jric6515]

Do you understand this story? She betrayed her. Do you think they are best friends?

[CLINTON @DikenaClinton]

Shakira in her motherhood era, embracing the beautiful chaos of motherhood and enjoying precious moments with her boys. What a beautiful sight! ❤️

[MaHMuD Waziri @Mahmud_wazeeree]

Claude is already learning corporate politics. Bro knows when to lie.😂😭

[D ø l l á r z z 💰 @abdoulllmuhd]

Bank Manager: “Why are you withdrawing your entire retirement savings?”

Customer: “Because my grandson thinks he’s going to college on a football scholarship, and he hasn’t told anyone he lost his sight.”

Bank Manager: “I’m sorry, sir. Did you say he lost his sight?”

Customer: “Yes. A car accident six months ago. He was supposed to be starting college this fall.”

Bank Manager: “Does the university know?”

Customer: “No. He hasn’t told them. He’s still pretending everything is fine.”

Bank Manager: “Why would he hide something like that?”

Customer: “Because football was his entire life. He thinks losing his sight means losing his future.”

Bank Manager: “And what are you planning to do with the money?”

[da bees @dabees65]

Bellerina swaps little tung tungs

[ROUGH @roughrexx]

He found out she’ve been aborting their babies because she wasn't ready to be a mother

[B9 @Boluwatiiffee]

🚨 Top Ten highest-paid Real Madrid players right now 💰

10. 🇧🇷 Rodrygo - €257K
9. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 Alexander-Arnold - €260K
8. 🇺🇾 Federico Valverde - €275K
7. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 Jude Bellingham - €300K
6. 🇧🇷 Vinicius Junior - €300k
5.🇫🇷 Kylian Mbappé - €6… View more