Randy Ohlmann

[Introvert Problems @IntrovertProbss]

Does anyone else stay up late purely to recoup time they need alone?

[World of Engineering @engineers_feed]

This is why it’s called ‘pizza’ 🍕

[World of Statistics @stats_feed]

How do you pronounce GIF?

[Randy Ohlmann @a_life_without]

@CraigBaird You need to check out the cathedral in Gravelbourg if it wasn't in your plans. Impressive for a small town! Enjoy the trip!

[LaughBreak: Dad Jokes ‘N More @MediocreJoker85]

English is the only language where you drive on parkways and park in driveways.

It’s also the only language where you recite in a play and play in a recital.

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips.

Yet you can tiptoe, but not tipfinger.

The word queue is just a “Q” followed by four silent letters.

“Jail” and “prison” are synonyms, but “jailer” and “prisoner” are antonyms.

When you transport something by car, it’s called a shipment.

When you transport something by ship, it’s called cargo.

English is fun.

[Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes]

I was really struggling to get my wife's attention....

So, I sat down on the sofa and looked comfortable. That did the trick.

[Lethbridge Hurricanes @WHLHurricanes]

We out here catching strays 😭

Please help us @CanadiensMTL , @Canes 🙏

[Randy Ohlmann @a_life_without]

@CoaldaleAB My street got cleaned today. It would've been nice to know that today was the day the sweeper was going to be down my street though. No signs at all. I don't have a driveway, so I would've moved my vehicle if I knew what day the sweeper was coming.

[Randy Ohlmann @a_life_without]

@TerriblyHQ Your breath.

[Randy Ohlmann @a_life_without]

@sskroughriders Congrats on an outstanding career Mitch! I loved watching you play! You reminded me of Rob Bagg so much with your dependable hands. You could catch the ball from anywhere and make a play. Enjoy the next chapter!

[Toronto Blue Jays @BlueJays]

April 25, 2017: Chris Coghlan did the IMPOSSIBLE!

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

Powerful: Google Leaves Homepage Empty In Honor Of Jesus's Empty Tomb https://t.co/uq7HH2HwCD

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

Absolute Psychopath Lets Microwave Count Down All The Way To Zero https://t.co/DRATRb7RN1

[Spill The Memes @SpillTheMemes]

😂

[Giga Based Dad @GigaBasedDad]

Wait for it!

[Dad Jokes @Dadsaysjokes]

There are 2 types of people in this world: those who can't relax when there are dishes in the sink and those who don't even notice them.

And they end up marrying each other.