Abby

chili’s is the new golf course

[Chase @chaselyons]

I HAVE NEVER BEEN DISRESPECTED THIS BADLY

[JIlllllll @dummyjig]

Boys rooms r so scary 🥺 where r all of ur stuffed aminals

[Jules @Julian_Epp]

Trying to celebrate Republicans losing while knowing that Democrats still won’t do anything progressive

[milk @milkinhisbag]

this is the ideal shower set up

[Zola Ray @zolamray]

We used to be a country. A proper country.

[donni saphire @donni]

Just invented a new kind of emotion… it’s when you’re calm but also insane

[Alli💫 @AlliGraz]

Mentally ill people be like “this is my comfort movie” and the movie is Revenge of the Sith

[Decay @sp0replay]

"golden retriever boyfreind" alright well were putting him down

[bobby wasabi @bobbyteriyaki]

“what if YOU were aborted?” bro does it look like I wanna be here rn

[reem @reemvil]

obsessed w this lady at the Vietnamese restaurant i just ordered from where i asked for extra sauce and she said one is enough

[mar 🫶🏼 @itsmariannnna]

it’s always “you up?” and never “you are the bane of my existence and the object of all my desires”

[luanne consciousness @goblinshoes]

you can either have healthcare or this many gatorades

[Kristen Arnett @Kristen_Arnett]

man at this bar is describing in great detail exactly what a deviled egg is to his date, a woman who already told him twice that she’s had them before

[eat soup @jasminericegirl]

venmo a woman $500 today

[Kim Quindlen @kimquindlen]

Today my doctor said “you look extra pale, have you been feeling okay?” and I responded “this is just how I look in January” and she wrote that down.