cornchips guzzardo

voted 2013 most likely

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

imagine how peaceful it must be to be this stupid. you could replace your whole media library with a set of jangling keys and be fulfilled forever

[Tim Soret @timsoret]

Frankly insane. I was probably one of the most psychologically prepared person in the world for this, and yet it still hits me like a truck.

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

@sadboystoic @BBish937 @ZONEofTECH @SamsungUK @SamsungMobileUS must be hard to just ask questions with a mouth full of boot

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

@yegordb @AlonzoWins @deedydas i read your paper and its clear the only thing deeper is the cavern in your skull your busted ass brain rattles around in

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

@tomwalkerisgood TOM: Tom chinchilla hat. Practical Tom possession hat.

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

@quendergeer

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

@froggerupdates every day we're praying for them to put in a working at the counter emote

[actioncookbook @actioncookbook]

USERS: you're alienating the people who actually use your product
TWITTER: likes are now florps
USERS: what
TWITTER: timeline goes sideways

[actioncookbook @actioncookbook]

USERS: we love twitter but it has problems
TWITTER: great we'll fix them
USERS: do you want to know what they are
TWITTER: absolutely not

[ape attack survivor @pissvortex]

[closing remarks]

J.D. Vance: (quivering) W-When we win, don’t forget that these people want you broke, dead, and your kids uh.. brainwashed.
Kamala on the most klonopin you’ve ever seen in your life, mouth pressed against the microphone: Clap if you think he should be killed

[🔆 Raccoon Girl 🫀❄️✨ @CrisprChild]

monty hall problem suggests it's advantageous to change ur gender once one of the other genders are revealed

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

@FroggerOW adding a frogger clip of "oh my god its a widowmaker!" to my streamdeck widow ult countdown timer

[joolsd @joolsd]

rekt

[Vee @SuperSquidoodle]

Gf and I couldn't stop laughing at this video the other night

[cornchips guzzardo @ahmeni]

@_ragingdawn @Tomycardy @YouTubeCreators @wami_id politely asking a burglar if i can have my money back

[dr. lio, phd ㋐ @lio_fotia]

got sick and feeling like this rn

[Gale Na @poisonjr]

[seeing an adult man] Wow. Like Bluey's dad