“Music is so great because you actually don’t know what’s going to strike a chord with people. We’re dealing in emotional truths that either resonate or don’t.” and that’s exactly what it is, some things can be for you and some don’t, you don’t have to love every single song of her or every album but also don’t be a bitch about it when you don’t, since you also call yourself a fan
My therapist , Taylor Swift, once said “enthusiasm can protect you from anything,” and “think of your energy as if it's expensive. not everyone can afford it,” and “bend when you can, snap when you have to,” and “you are not damaged from your mistakes, you are wise.” She’s right.
I told my male doctor the pain during sex had gotten so bad I was avoiding intimacy. He told me to “relax more” and that most women just need to “get out of their heads.” I asked if he’d ever told a male patient with erectile dysfunction to just relax and stop overthinking. He looked at his chart. I got a new doctor the next week. Turns out I had a condition that required actual treatment.
the systems to make this available and sustainable don’t exist in Nigeria. (if they ever did, they have deteriorated to a point that can’t support the current population).
the topic is quite infuriating. as a student you can barely watch a movie at the cinema. when you graduate and start your first job (if you manage to find one) can’t even pay your transport fair to the said office and back for a month. if you do decide to rent, the options are very bad because agencies that should maintain and define standards are not effectively doing their work, so you’ll probably spend even more than necessary to survive (that’s if you don’t die first). would love to see more effort on the side of people with more leverage please.
yes, we need to manage money smarter, eventually everyone needs to work their way out into the lives they think they deserve. but we are definitely emphasising the role of individual planning far more than the duty of care the government/state owes its people for all the funds they collect from the same people in form of taxes and crazy levies.
what is NSITF and ITF doing for me or the Nigerian workforce really that they charge all legitimate employers 1% of total payroll (including bonuses)? not to talk about larger tax lines like PAYE, VAT, WHT and CIT. yet, there is a lot of effort to audit and penalise anyone who is not paying.
where are the reliable and obvious communication or feedback channels for us to improve these systems together long-term??
even better, how do we get to punish the elected reps in government for not doing their jobs???
supporting young people should be our priority not looking down on us like we are stupid and can’t plan. there is always that chance, but that’s not the root cause. it should be fun and easy to support people as they transition into adulthood. if children don’t have a good memory of being supported by adults, why will they grow up to become good adults to children?
what’s the point of making a long term plan when you are making less than 30k per month? we don’t even have coins anymore but somehow, we are counting coins 😔.
unlearn shame. all forms of shame: unemployment, illness, vulnerability, longing, desire, errors, failures. you do not need to feel ashamed of what you are experiencing or living. freedom and shame cannot coexist.
Months into my grieving journey, I came to the realization that this had been other people’s reality too, long before it was mine. All those days I was living richly and happily, someone’s world had ended, that day was just my turn.
Someone out there probably feels a bit of shame, based on the mocking comments and quotes on this post.
“They suddenly start speaking everywhere.”
“They suddenly start looking to mentor”
Etc.
Just here to tell you it’s absolutely okay, as long as it’s honest work.
Everyone has a reason for doing what they do. That founder posting on Twitter, that employee posting on LinkedIn, that creator posting thrice a day, that friend reading for GRE, that neighbour writing IELTS, etc.
Everyone is trying to do what’s necessary to get ahead. This is simply the requirement for your own chosen path.
Just keep doing honest work and putting honest effort towards your own goal, theirs ain’t better than yours.
People may shame that your effort to speak at events or to have publication in your name, that’s okay.
But effort (especially in public) is almost always embarrassing until it pays off. And I tell you this for a fact: it pays off.