*casts Glibness*

To be a Gringo in Mexico - ah, that is euthanasia.
-Ambrose Bierce

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

"a bill for $200k? In THIS economy?!"

Guess I'm off to Fiesta for some dry ice and razor blades so that I can sell my kidneys, but until then, here's my $BTC wallet address: 32SHs9gTBXt9wGL5X38nwZu9XuGyEbkNvM

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

@acockyone @FBIHouston *Just* his, too. Gotta be something delightful.

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

@aeroparrot @pennylikeacoin @wbz The official Red Sox position when asked was "we do not limit purchase eligibility at Fenway Park." So no.

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

@_NeoMaga_ @ClaudetteGGibs1 The map is not the territory. The real world does not adhere as closely to your heuristic as you think it does.

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

@IwriteOK Audie Murphy was certainly more David than Goliath, as was Simo Häyhä. Carlos Hathcock was described as "a scarecrow" bc he was 120 pounds @ 5'10" when operating in Vietnam, and the Viet Cong weren't exactly man-mountains.

[Dave Peasant, Aspiring Lorax @aspiringpeasant]

@NuanceNews sorry to disappoint your expectations but reality is pretty stupid

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

@hoodedmexican @HugoMarat @dieworkwear Oxford collar button-down, I think

[ABC13 Houston @abc13houston]

Richard Simmons, legendary fitness guru, dies at 76, representative confirms https://t.co/gQMZ1qN4tW

[James Lucas @JamesLucasIT]

Animals interrupting wildlife photographers - a thread 🧵

1. A curious fox by Dan Dinu

[The author, Séamas O'Reilly @shockproofbeats]

Want to hear a funny story about something that happened to me this weekend? It concerns the internet, elephants, and the absurdity of online nostalgia.

[The author, Séamas O'Reilly @shockproofbeats]

We did it Joe.

[Jeremiah Johnson 🌐 @JeremiahDJohns]

After a long year, it's finally time. Announcing the Worst Tweets of 2023 Bracket!

I've spent the entire year collecting hundreds of deranged tweets, awful takes, and the most insane discourses on this site. Only 64 were chosen.

Now it's time to crown a champion.

[Tom Bloom @Orbitaldropkick]

Personages of Maleghast

[depths of wikipedia! @depthsofwiki]

OBSESSED with the person who makes pretzels of mathematically significant knots and then uploads blurry photos of them to Wikipedia

[Joshin and Jokien @joshcarlosjosh]

A message from those trapped at Burning Man has just been released:

"They have taken the bridge and the second hall. We have barred the gates but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes. We cannot get out. A shadow moves in the dark. We cannot get out. They are coming!"

[Joshin and Jokien @joshcarlosjosh]

uh oh! looks like someone online is enjoying something I don't personally care for! time to convince them my opinion about it is really the objective truth!!

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

Man, I saw "Clayface" trending and thought Mitch McConnell died

[Okoii @0koiii]

@larianstudios Thank you for making this game, it is an absolute masterpiece. I blew up Goblin camp in celebration

[rax ‘levon honkers’ king @RaxKingIsDead]

i wish it was less offensive to just straight up tell a friend ‘most of these problems you’ve been telling me about for weeks are obviously because you’re an active alcoholic’

[*casts Glibness* @alasurstrigis]

@ConditorCancri @Jotallerballer @jesawyer This is hemipenis erasure

[Traces of Texas @TracesofTexas]

Folks wait outside the Alabama theater in Houston for the premier of The Empire Strikes Back, the second movie in the Star Wars saga, 1980. The Alabama Theatre is a historic movie theater located at the intersection of Alabama Street and Shepherd Drive in the Upper Kirby district of Houston, Texas. Constructed in 1939 in the Art Deco and Streamline Moderne styles as a suburban theater, the Alabama primarily booked roadshow engagements through most of its history. It was a Bookstop for quite a while. Today, the theater is home to a Trader Joe's grocery store. It has a fabulous huge medallion on the ceiling. It took restoration crews more than 1000 hours to restore that medallion when Trader Joe's moved in.

Photo courtesy the awesome folks at @HoustonChron.