annaconda

smooth seas don’t make good sailors

[Jone @windbreakergod]

Saw a guy with a visible boner through his very tight ribbed skinny jeans drop his phone, reach down to pick it up, audibly fart, and then his hat fell off his head revealing he was bald

[𝐍𝐢𝐨𝐡 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐠 🇮🇷 ✡︎ @NiohBerg]

Iran before Jimmy Carter:

[sydney ♛ @mornings0da]

Just Shazamed a song I liked and it was by Meghan Trainor. This sucks man I’m killing myself

[Anthony Moore @AllThatandMoore]

What some small village in Ireland about to see

[Ryan Foster @ryanlfoster_]

Those pussies in Europe bout to learn about fentanyl n hell cats

[debo @killmefam]

Is 31 a good age to try skateboarding I weigh 297 pounds

[cats being weird little guys 👅 @weirdlilguys]

this is so important

[Ed @Oh_ItsEd]

Me and the homies at the club so we don’t get lost

[𝐋𝐢𝐯 @oliviaxjuliette]

part of becoming a grown woman is understanding that the greatest thing a man should bring to your life is peace, not happiness. your happiness is your own first and he can bring you some too. but a man who brings you infinite peace is where it’s at.

[Clarke @pleasuresystems]

I forgot Trader Joe’s requires cashiers to compliment an item every customer buys until today when the guy out of the blue just said “I love cilantro”. Twisted shit

[jazmin @itsnotjazminn]

idc how many compliments i get i wanna hear my man say it.

[trash jones @jzux]

no more fun facts. i want to hear a scary, unsettling fact about you

[Harry Hill @veryharryhill]

In the bathroom after 3 sips of a martini

[03/28/23 💍 @lxttyvibes]

I’m still loyal on bad terms.. that’s what people don’t get about loyalty..

[DRE ⚡️ @DRESPITFACTS]

Just because you love me, doesn’t mean I feel loved by you. Let that sink in.

[⋆ @lowkeyalbert]

& at the end of the day it is what it is

[𝒻. @300moods]

tulip table lamps

[Dan Go @CoachDanGo]

Society eats so much junk food that eating real food is considered dieting.