Ashley HG

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

[Me as a Mom]
Stranger: May I hold your baby?
Me: Sure
Stranger: *Holds baby*
Me: No backsies
Stranger:
Me: I said what I said

[Stephanie Ruhle @SRuhle]

If you aren’t getting vaxxed bc you don’t trust doctors, why are you going to the hospital when you get sick?

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

@Surfwindandfire Both sound awful

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

@sami_stacks @PleaseBeGneiss 😂😂

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

Pro tip: if you want to stay married, do not go to IKEA together on a Saturday.

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

@sami_stacks You can prob write that off as a business expense

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

@GronkDreams87 Front right all day

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

Welcome to your 30s. You now have a favorite burner on your stove.

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

Small @ChrisEvans in Captain America haunts my dreams.

[Dave Portnoy @stoolpresidente]

Hey @nflcommish remember that 250k donation you refused to take from me for frontline covid workers? I still have it. If you donate 250k to #barstoolfund to save small business I’ll match it. Quick 500k. Let’s go.

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

If anyone needs me, I will be loading and unloading the dishwasher for the rest of eternity.

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

@Surfwindandfire And chicken and pasta and saladddd

[Hillary Clinton @HillaryClinton]

Protecting one man's ego is not worth damaging the legitimacy of our democracy.

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

😂

[Robyn Schall Comic @RobynSchall]

When your 2020 goal list is trolling you!! #goals #humor #breakdown

[Chelsea Handler @chelseahandler]

love when a woman not in politics does more for the people than actual politicians.

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

Jared Kushner looks like the wax figure of Jared Kushner.

[Ashley HG @ashsmash84]

Somebody bubble wrap @BettyMWhite

[WhatserName @IamEveryDayPpl]

Melania decorating the White House this year like:

[Mikel Jollett @Mikel_Jollett]

What is this feeling where the President is speaking and I don't feel ashamed of my country?