Atheist Monkey

It doesn't matter if you believe in God, the Flying Spaghetti Monster or eating vegan we all die in the end.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

Dear Twitter,

If I offend you by tweets undirected at you... Realize that I'm funny as fuck or fuck off entirely. My humour isn't for all.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@Jandalize

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@Insatiabitch Don’t sweat it. You’ll figure it out

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@notsonormalnow @brigadam @YasMohammedxx @Dove The same reason you have cousins we descended from a common ancestor but we didn’t inherit all the same traits. Similar to how you and your siblings are slightly different.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@DoubleDumas @Insatiabitch All right let’s see em...

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@Insatiabitch Now you’ll meet someone cause you aren’t looking. He or she will treat you right. You will be ok.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@ontarioMarc @SkepticNikki @godless_mom I feel the same way about odd pronouns Marc

[Richard Dawkins @RichardDawkins]

“I cannot persuade myself that a beneficent & omnipotent God would have designedly created the Ichneumonidæ … feeding within the living bodies of caterpillars” (C Darwin, 1860).

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@kutu_michael @kelly__le They got the periodic symbol for Nitrogen (N) wrong. The one they used is actually Sodium (Na).

[Jason Ellis @EllisMate]

Stop sending me rollerblading videos?? I know it’s stupid! I was one of the first on the planet to know! Fuck!!

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@liberal_party Like fuck you are. Stop wasting canadian tax dollars

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@liberal_party @JustinTrudeau The only word they got right is spends.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

Sensitive twat waffles.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@Insatiabitch He’s the Nigerian prince. Sounds like he has a business opportunity for you.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@Dilf_Hunter_ @mexinonblonde You sound like my wife

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@trashtastica Everyone does to some extent.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@MATE0247 @dangerdunne @AcutelyImmoral @phavrephan4 @RoryMeep @Fritzing1 @YaBoyHeff @skitzobulldog @OI_Chief @Wendys @McDonalds @ChickfilA @amyschumer @lenadunham Unsubscribe

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@getongab When are you getting an iphone app? I wont sign up until you have one.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@AcutelyImmoral Are you allowed out to play yet?

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@MCifm @AcutelyImmoral It's not JUST to talk to him.

[Atheist Monkey @Atheist_Acuity]

@AcutelyImmoral @MCifm Monkies aren't rodents, dumbass.