It's not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one more responsive to change......Meaning if we learn to adapt to life's stresses, strengthen our roots, we will emerge more resilient, perhaps a little bent, but hopefully not broken.
You CANNOT go back in time and change the decisions you took. Forgive yourself, move on, be your best version. You're alive and until death all defeat is psychological.
Rebuild.