Boone Daniels

chili without beans is just meat soup

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@Lily_McSnarly when your bush is blocking out all the sunlight, it’s time to do something

[Charlotte Clymer 🇺🇦 @cmclymer]

He struggled to get through his eulogy for Lindsey Graham--which he was clearly seeing for the first time--and openly disagreed with it while reading, insisting that not everyone liked Mr. Graham.

While walking by it, he casually rapped his knuckles on Mr. Graham's casket like a waiter who's just taken your order on fifty-cent wings night at TGI Fridays.

He fell asleep during the other eulogies for Mr. Graham, five feet away in the box, even as the other eulogists took the opportunity to kiss Trump's ass while he nodded off.

Just think, Trump loyalists: this is as good as it gets for how you'll be remembered someday. This is the peak.

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

If you don’t love Willie Nelson you have no love in your heart

[Willie Nelson @WillieNelson]

To whom it may concern and to everyone else as well,

[Renee Libby @ReneeLibby95084]

Thank you @elonmusk for calling Chef Jose Andres an asshole.
You reminded me to promote my fundraiser for World Kitchen on here. 90% of proceeds go there directly.😂 RTs appreciated ,Tweeps💙 Thanks
https://t.co/BZRdeF8bmP

[This You? @Thiss_Youu]

@Cobratate https://t.co/CUUIZvDV9v

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@metroadlib Consultant here who used to be outsourced c-titles

I get it

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

She’s running

nobody’s this stupid in real life

[Meghan McCain @MeghanMcCain]

YESSS! Thank you President Trump!!! Our children can’t go outside and we’re all ensconced in lethal levels of smoke because of Canada’s failed policies.

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

Requiem for a Republic

[George Wallace @MrGeorgeWallace]

What on Earth makes you think any the wockaflockas around him will suddenly grow backbones and whatnot? If they're still in at this point their asses are ALLLLL the way in. Shit's about to get Waffle House at 2am messy. It was cute to think it couldn't happen here and whatnot.

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@SecWar Makeup, frosted highlights… hahaha, you should make this your grindr profile pic

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@BlackKnight10k It helps Trump and Putin

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@SecWar Just because you need booster shots doesn’t mean anyone else does

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@WhiteHouse You people are utter shitheads

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@ReneeLibby95084 If you sell it to her, you’ll see it on her page for $25 tomorrow.

Next time she bids, mark it up higher than your last counter!

[amanda moore 🐢 @noturtlesoup17]

Currently in Portland, Maine to cover ICE. If you are an immigration attorney here with Somali clients, I would love to talk to you! My DMs are open.

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@spencerpratt Perhaps the “housing providers” should cut back on the avocado toast

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@MrEvanRoss @JakeSherman @JoshKraushaar As long as people still need to void their bladders, that corpse should never go cold

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@Freedom250 @noturtlesoup17 …and 17 people sighed

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@metroadlib Jaw-droppingly soulless

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

@MorePerfectUS Burn it all down

[Boone Daniels @boon_DanielBoon]

If you recognize them no you don’t

[Jason Bassler @JasonBassler1]

Police in North Carolina asked the public to identify two men who recently cut down a brand-new Flock camera.

Reports claim callers are trolling police by flooding phone lines with tips like "Batman and Robin" and "The Lone Ranger and Tonto." 😂😂