Caroline Harrison

senior engineering manager (iOS) @Public / doin my best ——— all opinions and poor taste jokes are my own.

[Caroline Harrison @carleihar]

Feeling a little like my paycheck cause it’s always “year to date” and never “year to marry”

[Robert Bork III @BobbyBorkIII]

Guys I think what can be might actually be burdened by what has been.

[Fred Wellman @FPWellman]

The thing about leopards is eventually they will eat you too.

Your favorite local restaurant closing because the nice family who owns it getting deported. You thought they were some of the “good ones.” The price of produce skyrocketing even before the camps are built as immigrants flee. Your daughter dying of sepsis because the lawyers feel it’s too risky to perform that D&C.

No more FAFSA for your kids college because you didn’t know that was part of the Department of Education. Veterans having their benefits cut because they rolled back the PACT Act as too expensive. That factory in town that was going to build chips and employ your kids never breaking ground because of the repeal of the CHIPs act. The bridge that was going to cut your commute in half being canceled because of the repeal of the Infrastructure Act.

That sweet government job that you’ve loved because you can work 8 hours a day and fish on the weekends has been slated for a MAGA Schedule F slot because it controls funding for contracts that will go to Republican donors, so you’re fired without cause or any union protections.

You’ll blame Biden or the local Democrats probably. But it will be fine because Elon promised it would be uncomfortable at first but it will get better. You were just so sure it would be uncomfortable for…you know…”those people.” Not you.

But that’s leopards for you. They eat whatever is available.

[˖ cas ✴︎ is unique ᵎᵎ @jellyousieun]

see shes better than me because if i was her i’d call him a fat cunt on national television

[Kamala Harris @KamalaHarris]

No. ❤️

[Tina Turtle 🐢 @tinaturttle]

Yeah but in the clerb, we all fam

[chloe 🐇 @SapphoSys]

going to the .DS_Store anyone want anything

[Bojan Tunguz @tunguz]

This one hurts.

[Magdalena @_RustyRooster]

C is Latin, the root of all modern languages, the whole universe used to speak it.

C++ is French, it’s Latin with fancy rules, used by the elite around the world & in specific circles.

JavaScript is English, everybody speaks it, most speakers speak it poorly and others don’t bother learning another language.

Java is German, it’s verbose, over-complicated and it made me cry several times. I won’t elaborate.

Python is Esperanto, it was created to be so easy everyone could speak it. Its speakers could benefit from a shower once in a while.

Rust is Russian, most speakers have an authoritarian left background and want to spread it worldwide.

[ScratchedWinter @ScratchedWinter]

Sims loading screen advice lol

[bsky.app/profile/iridescentaudio.co.uk @iridescentaudio]

Do something that scares you every day.
If you do that, then each day, little by little, you will be scared. Every day will be scary, and your life will be very scary. 💫

[Adam @adamgreattweet]

Nobody will remember:
- Your salary
- How “busy you were”
- How many hours you worked

Kronk will remember:
- The poison
- The poison for Kuzco
- The poison chosen specifically to kill Kuzco, Kuzco’s poison

[Cassidy @cassidoo]

[staring at a merge conflict]

me: *under my breath* this is going to ruin the tour

[LaurieWired @lauriewired]

survival tip that programmers DON'T WANT YOU TO KNOW

[Eren Bali @erenbali]

AI will replace developers the same way microwaves replaced cooking.

[trash @trashh_dev]

my utils folder in every project

[LaurieWired @lauriewired]

Due to my elite programming skills, I have figured out how to shave off THIRTY SECONDS from my program's startup time.

Here's some optimization tips:

1. Remove the sleep(30) call you added a month ago and forgot about

[chase @_chase_____]

when ur eating soup and u finish ur bread it’s like ok. what‘s even the point anymore

[gon @chinesegon]

nobody will remember:
- your salary
- your fancy title
- how busy you were
- how many hours you worked

people will remember:
- that time you broke prod