Casey Martinez

just call me Cat Lady

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

"Can I just get like a pitcher of michgolden?" -my life motto

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

Those champagne pics at weddings are so cute but tbh it would kill me to waste a whole bottle of champagne

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

Gronk: the most likely NFL player to eat Tide pods
Tide: I think we found our new spokesperson!

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

@stefanmartinez2 I'm gonna be a hermit

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

I could make a Venn diagram about my chances of puking and crying later. Spoiler alert they overlap A LOT #BUFvsMIN

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

Yikes vikes

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

Alright Zim put me in anywhere I can do better than these bafoons

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

I'm nauseous

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

@Jessica_Scheu Letting the clock run 25 seconds at the end was irresponsible, we aren't used to counting on our kickers

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

"What is the highest number of missed field goals in a single game?" "I couldn't imagine greater than 2" .......

[NOTSportsCenter @NOTSportsCenter]

What Daniel Carlson sees when he attempts a field goal:

[mary kay @marykayblige]

We just got a free round of shots bc the female bartender saw a stranger put a hand on our friends leg. Girl power 4ever

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

When Zim calls me later I'm gonna be sure to tell him to bring back Kai and also give Laquon away

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

Can we get a bucket of Miller lites and a round of macarenas please?

[zillionaire nae @Deenaeeee]

Demi overdoses, it’s her fault bc she’s a grown woman who chose to do drugs, Mac Miller overdoses and it’s Ariana Grande’s fault bc she broke up with him. Just say you hate women and go...

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

In summation, the first football game of the season: flag, flag, flag, field goal, pizza hut commercial, field goal, coca cola, flag flag flag flag #nfl

[Colin Kaepernick @Kaepernick7]

Believe in something, even if it means sacrificing everything. #JustDoIt

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

#truelove is when he gets you another glass of wine and never questions what # you're on

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

For fifteen years I have literally thought the line was "yes, I farted" and just today I realized it's "yes I flaunt it" in the classic hit 1 2 Step

[Casey Martinez @caseymartini]

My dad finnagled our way backstage at Lynyrd Skynyrd by pressuring security to see if we could use the restroom and honestly I totally get why I am the way I am