sonovabitch

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

Maybe Stav will surprise me with shrimp someday. #shrimp

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@GregCasar What can we do to help?

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@murderxbryan Good band too.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

Always the non tippers who watch you the entire time you prepare their food or drink. Psychos.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

I think 311 might be more embarrassing than Sublime ever was. What the fuck are these guys even talking about? All I know is it makes me feel like I’m in an arcade and I’m about to cash in my tickets for a yinyang necklace.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@williemurder “I’ll just eat it if I get pulled over”

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

Did medieval people just not go down on each other? Shit had to be very smelly and bad right? Maybe just held their noses? But like even their mouths were fucked up.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@__LWTRS Bluegrass Twitter #bluegrass

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

Sex, drugs and rock’n’roll: out. Sex, some weed and bluegrass: in.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

The sexlife of bluegrass fans: sexy.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

Something a lot of people don’t talk about is how sexy Bluegrass is.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

“Take your manic pixie dream girl and stick it up your ass, stick it up your ass, stick it up your ass” 🎶 to tune of Nookie 🎶

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@__LWTRS Combine them! Disrupt.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

When you listen to that one album by one of your favorites that you accidentally never really listened to for far too long. Like a present to yourself that you saved for just the right time.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@questella I would make an omelette outta those

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@LarryScallops Do y’all even have a tractor?

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

Just remembered this one lady who came into my work and bought two packs of 3 @Zyrtec each and told me she takes 4 or 5 at a time to make sure they work. I wonder what that feels like.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

Predicting Napoleoncore arriving very soon. Two cornered hats, little guys, hands in jackets, caring about wars, Josephines, the alps. Napoleon this, Napoleon that.

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@falseroxy Cake is the only band I’ve ever listened to

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

@LarryScallops Maybe you need a helmet?

[sonovabitch @cshartley]

White Claw Grandpas are one of the worst categories of people.