.

pre-owned coffin salesman

[jurdle @jurndan]

My dream job is throwing coffins into the ocean

[jurdle @jurndan]

im 50% the freak of the week

[. @cuhnor]

@VVITCHBITCH666 https://t.co/kzd30pVxSN

[Kendra @kendrawcandraw]

Fuck using quarantine to improve myself as a person I'm committing to being dumber, and worse

[Chad @anything4views]

I may not have Corona Virus but I do have come over virus hahahaha.... text me 😘

[. @cuhnor]

@autumnthome god lmao

[Keligula @AechErvin]

All im saying is climate change wasn't an issue when we were sacrificing virgins to the Sun God regularly

[. @SuiNeltwork]

The pirates have unionized

[. @cuhnor]

YOOO tonight I got to open for Motion City Soundtrack, crowd of 1000+
one of the biggest/coolest shows I've ever played 😬

[yedoye @yedoye_]

it's crazy heroin has ravaged white america and they are not any better at jazz

[. @cuhnor]

Ben Gibbard and the Lizard Wizard

[. @cuhnor]

@humanbuttwipe consider it

[. @cuhnor]

@jeremydlarson Disco Tits - Tove Lo
https://t.co/m9icDCpXlL

[. @cuhnor]

6th grader: Mr. Middlebrook what year were you born?

Me: 1996

6th grader: Ahh, the year Everybody Loves Raymond premiered.

lmao WHAT? 😂

[ruby 🐊 @roobeekeane]

IS YOUR CHILD TEXTING ABOUT HAMLET?

• OMFG - Oop, My Father’s Ghost
• AF - Avenging Father
• iPad - I, Polonius, am dead
• DM - Denmark
• OMG - Ophelia my gal,
• NDDYYSSA - Nooo don’t drown yourself you’re so sexy aha

[★ Dumb Blondes Club ★ @peaceandbruv]

you know what beach boys yeah it would be fucking nice

[Brendan O'Hare @brendohare]

If I was in charge of the Batman movies I would do a brief scene where it's implied there is a Batman in every city in America, each of varying skill. For example, the one in Grand Rapids is locked in his car

[. @cuhnor]

GOT 'EM

[. @cuhnor]

new 1975 is just lackluster cage the elephant

https://t.co/jaGRCMG6mo