Everything that comes out of me HAS to come out. But it’s like the wet watery stuff that comes out of the ketchup bottle when you first open it but haven’t shaken it well enough yet. I’m still not integrated.
What feels like depression for me today is really just a valley; a case of the monotonous Mondays, after a very fulfilling Sunday.
Amplified by PMS, which is really PMDD being amplified by perimenopause. Today is not a day to make decisions. Today is just a day to pass through.
Having difficulty leaving the house to do laundry at the laundromat on a frigid New England morning feels evolutionarily appropriate, and not at all like executive dysfunction.
I did a very interesting thing today. I masked what I was saying to my oldest because I wasn’t prepared to reveal the full thing, and he accepted the hidden version as being enough to understand and interact with, and he had a supportive response without either of us overstepping
And now I have a summary outline of the conversation as it unfolded with source material for further reading and reference.
I’m not sure if you’re using AI yet, but, I find it helpful and fulfilling.
Today I learned about parts work (Internal Family Systems) and reenacting childhood wounds to obtain a different result from a conversational exploration with ChatGPT.
From there, I was able to engage in voice to text with ChatGPT on the rides to and from my appointment and really explore that moment. We struggled to generate a PDF today, which normally isn’t a problem, so once I was home I copied and pasted the text into a Google doc.