dan!

time genius | @remarkablepod | @arsparadoxica

[dan! @dandevorak]

find me somewhere else

[charlie @BUNNlCULA]

bacteria live in water.

[dan! @dandevorak]

@falseroxy I think he would be very charming when he gets embarrassed

[dan! @dandevorak]

@largacty3 >water in a coffee cup

[the michael jackson of stomp clap @necrobranson]

Trying to avoid eye contact with my wife this Saturday morning as she has a big exclamation point quest giver mark over her head

[dan! @dandevorak]

It’s striking how direct the throughline is between Vanessa Lachey’s current reality TV host career and her 2011 guest spot on 30 Rock

[dan! @dandevorak]

“Act your weight” except we’re making fat girls get louder

[dan! @dandevorak]

@1followernodad Damn I thought they would’ve called Gary S. Carlo

[dan! @dandevorak]

maybe the highest honor you can achieve is to be at the beck and call of beautiful woman

[roxy demento @falseroxy]

@muppetspice one of the best parts of being married is just being like, 'help' and having them attend to you like a pit crew

[dan! @dandevorak]

@Variety the fuck you mean “live-action”????

[dan! @dandevorak]

@internetofshit gotta be the smart bookmark
https://t.co/CoWc617Th3

[dan! @dandevorak]

this actually is your father’s root beer

[dan! @dandevorak]

@agraybee you’re describing a consumer preference. getting somebody to pay (the extremely low price of) $3 for a mobile game in 2011 was impossible, as users gravitated almost exclusively towards free/freemium apps. “they” only went for the model because it was the only one that made money

[dan! @dandevorak]

I am soooooooo serious when I say if you can’t stop your laptop from falling asleep when you close it you are too dumb to be using AI

[sudox @kmcnam1]

jfc....

[𝕸𝖆𝖗𝖈𝖔𝖘 📘🦷🔼 @Homievulgaris]

Dm me if you look like this

[dan! @dandevorak]

they should call it bitchcoin because all you fuckers do is whine

[dan! @dandevorak]

@JimDMiller @AbdulElSayed It’s not free healthcare if you pay for it with your taxes. I already get low-quality healthcare from for-profit insurance.

[dan! @dandevorak]

@JimDMiller @AbdulElSayed Jim we already pay regular doctors with normal money

[dan! @dandevorak]

@andersleehere You could just go to any Sheetz for that experience

[dan! @dandevorak]

Dutch people be like: star pull

[dan! @dandevorak]

me and bozo

[USGMEN（うさぎメン） @USGMEN_GIF]

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