Ripe Plantain™

Quiet storm.
Ghetto child.
Memento Mori.

RTs = Encourage debate.

"One thing we all adore
Something worth dying for ...

[Ripe Plantain™ @elSenorPluto]

2027 election settlement(s) in progress. Them no dey hide do am, na in front of your koro koro eyes e dey sup.

Worse part be say - the other candidate no go give shi shi.

[Nigeria Stories @NigeriaStories]

BREAKING: President Bolq Tinubu Approves ₦46 Billion Kano Airport Runway Reconstruction

[menace @Kroniebits]

How much would I have to drink for a mosquito to instantly die from alcohol poisoning when it bites me

[Ludonauta @LudensLudonauta]

I was studying MCPs and this comment really blew my mind.

[Ripe Plantain™ @elSenorPluto]

Anytime I come across any Adobe ad on any platform, I click through, wait for the webpage to load fully, then close the webpage.

F***k adobe, they pioneered this perpetual subscription bs

[Machiavelli Bot @UnmodernmanBot]

You are admired only when you win. Until then, you are tolerated at best, mocked at worst, and invisible in between. This is the law of existence: success or contempt. The world does not pity the unsuccessful man, it condemns him.

[purple🍃✨ @doseofpurple_]

not using ai and still getting 60% ai detected has to be the modern version of being accused of witchcraft.

[Ripe Plantain™ @elSenorPluto]

@gifylicious @Hybrid_Ola We are all wired differently. What might be difficult to the general population, might be easy for some few persons.

Some people learn languages very fast, some never forget a face, some are good with numbers, some have excellent eye and hand coordination - without trying much.

[Francis @ghostof_francis]

Generational wealth starts with one delusional nigga

[Ramin Nasibov @RaminNasibov]

Ibuprofen looking around in my body not knowing where to start:

[a meek thug @gib_smoke]

-deletes whatsapp.
-leaves social media.
-leaves the city.
-moves to jalingo.
-pigeon comes with a note.
-opens note.
-that one girl looking for money to fill gas.

😩💔😭

[Ripe Plantain™ @elSenorPluto]

Cost of new (redundant) poverty tracker system - ₦200 billion.

Another SPV for embezzling.

Somehow,,someday, we'll have y'all heads. For now, continue wasting the times and future of tomorrow. You guys are literally toying with people's lives.

[Nairametrics @Nairametrics]

Finance Minister Taiwo Oyedele says the Federal Government will introduce a system to track poverty levels and household incomes to measure whether its economic reforms are actually improving Nigerians' lives.

[Tai Lopez @tailopez]

Gustavo Fring was right, if you have a problem that means it can be solved. If it cannot be solved then it is not a problem. It is a reality to be accepted.

[Savy @Savy4895]

“Mummy has already washed the plates”

[femiiiiii. @femiiiszn]

we really used to ask teachers if we could drink water.

[Ripe Plantain™ @elSenorPluto]

Series M 😂😂😂

[Exec Sum @exec_sum]

BREAKING: Data analytics platform Databricks is raising a $3 billion Series M at a $188 billion valuation led by Coatue

[Ripe Plantain™ @elSenorPluto]

Lol and behold, it's the season of court affidavits.

Raise a toast to the dead with an empty glass.

[Sir Francis @imariabe_jnr]

Anita Baaki, Mary Habila’s colleague recounted her final moments.

[Ripe Plantain™ @elSenorPluto]

@ruffydfire Government settle the last terrorist. This one's want their share too. Billions billions.

[Akóh 🎴 @ManLikeAkoh]

Lawyers just plenty for Lawless country.

Their own no pass make them dey collect 10% for rent and land sales.

[Attah Akor @attah_akor]

Nobody:

The bride's friends at the wedding after advising her to leave the groom several times:

[Hybrid Athlete Guy @Hybridathlete]

6 years as a firefighter taught me that if you wear your seatbelt, it is very difficult to die in a car crash, even a relatively high speed one.

It also taught me that it is very easy to die if you are not wearing a seatbelt.

I can't tell you how many times I was first on scene to a 50+ mph crash, even head on or rollovers, and the cars were smashed to shit, but everyone in the cars was completely fine, not much more than some scratches or bruises.

In many cases, all occpants were out of the vehicles and walking around before we even got there.

But if anyone wasn't wearing their seatbelt, they were seriously fucked up or dead on arrival.