Jorge

Texas 🇲🇽

[Freddy🇩🇪 @FreddyLA7]

DUDE LMAO THIS IS A GAS STATION😭😭😭

[Fullcourtpass @Fullcourtpass]

Kevin Durant was seen leaving Nobu Malibu with an unidentified woman

​Durant reportedly hid behind a bush to avoid the paparazzi taking pictures before they both got into the same car and drove off

(via @DailyMail)

[brian @brianonhere]

Chuck: Ernie, before we go I got just one more question for Victor—

Ernie: Chuckster, I don’t think this is—

Chuck: — Vic, Now How do you say “Big ol women” En Francais?

Wembanyama (stone faced): I don’t like the question, Charles, for me, you know, women hold up half the sky

[SLAM @SLAMonline]

Always rises to the moment. Shoutout Devin Vassell.

(📸: @Tunde_Tifase)

[Trill Withers @TylerIAm]

That beer hit my hand on a Friday like Mjolnir

[SB 🪖 @welovesweetboy_]

“i’m watching spider noir in color”

[Django Gold @django]

watching Indiana Jones for the first time, do archaeologists typically kill this many people?

[s @cinemashawn3]

when i see a negative opinion on a movie i really like

[Clov! 🍉 @Clovmoon]

Arigato wey

[Swann Marcus @SwannMarcus89]

Fun fact: Baseball spring training exists because a baseball owner thought a hot spring in Arizona had magic powers so he started having his team train near the magic hot spring and then he won the World Series so everyone started training close to the magic water

[FOX Sports: MLB @MLBONFOX]

"He just got home after a really brutal work week and sat down to watch his team play. Make them give up 6 runs in the top of the 1st and then get shutout."

[Shrek @Shrek]

Y’all mind if an ogre speaks a little español tonight?

[prince @Loueezus]

I know the money changed me cuz I ain’t been to Little Caesars in a minute

[McNasty @McNasty]

i wonder if ive ever bought milk from the same cow twice

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

My ducks may not be in a row, but at least they're having fun. Your ducks probably hate you for making them line up like that.

[Angry Brewers Fan @MiniMegal]

Average fan reaction to their team being bad:

NFL: Our team just sucks 🤷‍♂️
NHL: Our team just sucks 🤷‍♂️
NBA: Our team just sucks 🤷‍♂️
MLB: The great Billy Joe Kimble curse of 1953 is the reason my shortstop is drawing walks at a below average rate 😡

[Reid Wiseman @astro_reid]

Only one chance in this lifetime…

Like watching sunset at the beach from the most foreign seat in the cosmos, I couldn’t resist a cell phone video of Earthset. You can hear the shutter on the Nikon as @Astro_Christina is hammering away on 3-shot brackets and capturing those exceptional Earthset photos through the 400mm lens. @AstroVicGlover was in window 3 watching with @Astro_Jeremy next to him.

I could barely see the Moon through the docking hatch window but the iPhone was the perfect size to catch the view…this is uncropped, uncut with 8x zoom which is quite comparable to the view of the human eye. Enjoy.

[Mike “The Burg” Burgan @mike_burgan]

Today’s to do list:

1. Bite off more than I can chew
2. Build Rome in one day
3. Poke a bear with a stick
4. Beat a dead horse
5. Skate on thin ice

[misto @mistowho]

went into dominoes and said "pizza pizza" they shot me in the chest with a rifle

[Skoog @Skoog]

it’s rare to see an all-timer happen in real time but this is one of those