Evan!

World Mancala Champion, Jr. Age Division, 1999-2004

[Evan! @eschclamation]

I always thought that "Pringles" was short for "Potato Ringles" but now that my brain is almost developed, I realize that makes no sense.

[Evan! @eschclamation]

@YeezyJunior @carolinehutt10 Gotta love some good ol’ opDbs

[Tilda Swinton @NotTildaSwinton]

.@lordemusic Hello

[Evan! @eschclamation]

Never forget that America relies also on the passion and toil of its great thinkers and visionary artists. #July4 https://t.co/S9zMt45Tlx

[Evan! @eschclamation]

@duffalo_ ok this is fine

[Evan! @eschclamation]

#KP4OS

[Evan! @eschclamation]

@porkchopbuns Please send it to me if you'd be okay with that!

[Evan! @eschclamation]

@eschclamation Some days more like 20% tb completely h.

[Evan! @eschclamation]

I get 5-12% of my self-worth from airbnb hosts' reviews.

[Evan! @eschclamation]

But What About Those Mites?

[Evan! @eschclamation]

Those two adjectives are a good place to start, yes. I can think of a few more. https://t.co/UbO2crJIFT

[Governor Mike Pence @GovPenceIN]

Calls to ban Muslims from entering the U.S. are offensive and unconstitutional.

[Evan! @eschclamation]

A pile of broken glass this large should cause at least 4 moms to appear and be like, "STAND OVER THERE I WILL TAKE CARE OF IT!"

[The Kansas City Star @KCStar]

White House staff prank President Obama with ‘stalking’ snowmen https://t.co/s3X2khjXDe

[Evan! @eschclamation]

Well, if you insist! https://t.co/KMclfWHpoW

[Lenexa Police @LenexaPolice]

Accidents galore. Main culprits are K-10, I-435 and I-35. Sounds like an excellent day to go nowhere and binge watch your favorite shows

[Horse Facts @_horsefacts]

ask horse what potatoes they prefer and it is most likely that they will respond "scalloped" #horsefact

[kcpolice @kcpolice]

Once again, lusty deer are abounding on area roadways & won't let your car get in the way of their quest for lovin. Be alert #annualreminder

[Evan! @eschclamation]

There is just that certain way every midwestern dad says "zucchini."

[The University of Chicago @UChicago]

In honor of #Halloween, hear "Werewolf Bar Mitzvah" from #30Rock on the @Rockefeller_Chi carillon, the world's largest musical instrument:

[Evan! @eschclamation]

#NameAMoreIconicTrio #RBG4L