entertainmeweakly

Pop culture mixups and remashes.
Collect the whole set at

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
- Ron White

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

@MarkHamill @goldenglobes

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

@JaggedAuthor @benedictsred Knees&Toes, followed by a pair of facial products called Eyes & Ears, and Mouth&Nose

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

You didn't ask for reality. You asked for more teeth.
- Dr. Wu, Jurassic World” (2015)

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

@SethAbramson Prime is $179 and I need updates on savings hacks. Also there's a heart specialist that keeps begging me not to do something to my blueberries. And I own a mouse so I can never turn off my computer again.

[Jesse McLaren @McJesse]

Always remember- nothing at karaoke is stopping you from singing the Weird Al version.

[aRIZZen @georgegotjokes]

If baseball really wants to get exciting, they’d let a celebrity throw the LAST pitch. Bases loaded, here’s Danny DeVito.

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

@MissFlyByNight Paranormal Activity streaming series pitch

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

It's coexistence or no existence.
- Bertrand Russell

[Michael McKean @MJMcKean]

I googled "barcelona diarrhea" and a very obscure Billy Joel song came up.

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

@OccupyDemocrats

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

Does the label "long-term long-distance low-commitment casual girlfriend" mean nothing to her?
- Ken, "Barbie" (2023)

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

I used to be rock & roll, but now I carry a little plastic flip box with individual tooth flosser picks in it

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

Ding.
- Hector Salamanca

[Fear Before The Marge Of Simpson @cleaming_]

i am become jimmy, eater of worlds

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

Hundreds of wise men cannot make the world a heaven, but one idiot is enough to turn it into a hell.
― Raheel Farooq

[💯ℂ𝕣𝕒𝕫𝕪𝔸𝔽👑🍄𝔹𝕦𝕥ℂ𝕦𝕥𝕖💯 @Crazy_ButCute2]

Men will literally change the name of a whole damn app instead of going to therapy

[Noah Garfinkel @NoahGarfinkel]

Cinnabon is actually short for Cinnamon Bonaparte, Napoleon’s stripper daughter.

[entertainmeweakly @ewtweetly]

Okay, meet me at the mall.
- Teen Talk Babie, 1992

[Flups @TheRealFlups]

No, autocorrect, I will not give up and will continue to type a lengthy word knowing that I have incorrectly typed several letters until YOU back down and give me the correct spelling suggestion. I’ve got all day, my friend.