Fish Police

Regular insight and inimitable quotes from a primitive fish brain.

[Gandalv @Microinteracti1]

Abraham Lincoln got shot in the head and still managed to keep the country together. Franklin Roosevelt ran the entire Second World War from a wheelchair. Eisenhower defeated Hitler and then, just to stay busy, built 48,000 miles of motorway. Kennedy looked at the moon, said “we’ll have that,” and inside a decade they did. Reagan stared down the Soviet Union until it simply gave up and went home.

Two hundred and fifty years. Forty-six men. Men who stormed beaches, split atoms, faced down nuclear annihilation over breakfast and then filed sensible paperwork about it afterward.

And then, after all of that, the entire accumulated weight of American history, the most consequential democratic experiment the world has ever seen, produced this.

A television review.

No Mars landing. No cure for cancer. No Soviet empire dissolved before lunch. Just a man in the White House, in the year 2026, informing the internet that a CBS chat show host had no talent.

That is what 250 years of American greatness built. America should be deeply, permanently ashamed of itself.

If you like what you read, follow Gandalv on Substack:

https://t.co/M6CNAnz656

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@WhiteLionII1 Except this is a maintenance rig passing Cape Town on its way north, anyway good try!

[Mike Drucker @MikeDrucker]

Twitter is fun because you get to be like, “Ducks are good” and someone in your mentions will go, “Um, I’m sorry but my brother is married to a duck scientist and this is a harmful view” and then someone else pops up going, “Your silence about horses is extremely telling”

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@flightradar24 Any idea how Emirates is able to hide realtime flight status. There are massive ongoing delays and cancellations and yet status systems show flights are scheduled to leave on time. I smell a coverup!

[NO CONTEXT HUMANS @HumansNoContext]

i love seeing their heads turn

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@nothing Pick me I’m random!

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@PicturesFoIder You know it’s serious when you immediately call Robbie and Josh and not the Police!

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@rugbyworldcup Bus looks like it’s running a bit rich 🚌💨💨💨

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@ClydeAdonis1 @Leo99Meyer @scrumming_ten Because there aren’t any. Rugby programs in SA are just time fillers between ads for boerewors and castle lager 🤣

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@KeithQuinn88 On the money Keith! Reading the comments below you have clearly triggered the South African cheerleaders. They know the style of rugby they play is boring, they thrive on the controversy cos they have nothing else to offer.

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@jaybrand16 What a surprise, a xenophobic comment from a South African!

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@DeonFosterLEAD @T2Rugby lucky
/ˈlʌki/
adjective:
having, bringing, or resulting from good luck.

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@sandile_mphuthi @SaffasRugby 33% unemployment so yes I guess they don't!

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@Jonatha36683451 @rog_buy @jaredwright17 Oh I get it now, so you have a first 40 captain and then a second 40 captain and a water boy calling the plays! So why does the first 40 captain get all the praise, and I’m pretty sure we saw the water boy talking to the ref 🤷‍♂️

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@rog_buy @jaredwright17 Oh yeah I forgot, Rassie (and his radio controlled 'water boy') is actually the captain!

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@Abramjee This is interesting cos you were quite vocal about hostage taking events in SA!

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@SonnyBWilliams Yeah you maybe should have sat on the bench for this one!

[Fish Police @fishpoliceman]

@Will_Killmore Nope